I started several devotions for this morning’s breakfast; a Father’s Day chat, and Memorial Day recognition, a direct and forceful talk about a Christian man and his calling, but I have been led to the book of Ephesians for today’s conversation with you. First.. a personal story. I went in recently for a consult on ADHD. I wanted to try some new treatment options, and needed to undergo an assessment with a new doctor. I sat in the waiting room for 10 or 15 minutes, tapping my foot, reading magazines, pacing… until the assistant came and took me to a room with nothing on the floor, walls, or ceiling. The only thing in the room was a rather sturdy looking desk with a monitor and a keyboard. The assistant explained that letters would flash on the screen and I was to press a key each time this happened, except when the letter “X” flashed up on the screen. I began, and the letters came, fast and furious, then slower… then fast again. Here and there I skipped the “X” when I should, but as I got into a rhythm, I found that the “X” would flash, and I’d press the key… just because I had become used to pressing the key. Then, I became incensed at myself for hitting the “X”… so upset that I would mess up the next couple of keypresses. “A” – press, “I” – press, “N” – press, “K” – press, “X” – press… D’OH!!! It seems that this is much like our life as Christians… we naturally do what we repeat. 14 minutes of that seemed like an eternity, and I am glad I didn’t take a blood pressure test soon thereafter. Take a guy with ADHD and put him in a small room, make him do one boring thing, boy I tell you… I’ll bet they had a hidden camera somewhere! Let’s see how this idea of conditioned stimulus and response applies to Paul’s writings.

So, Ephesians… are we going to talk about the fact Paul seemingly wrote Ephesians expressly to demonstrate Pastor Jeff’s [our senior pastor] continued focus on the difference between (and necessity of) orthodoxy and orthopraxy? After all, the book is split neatly in two between “how to believe” in Chapters 1 through 3 and “how to live” in Chapters 4 through 6! Perhaps we will talk about relationships and focus on the gender-specific verses from 22 through 26? It’s always nice to talk about submissive wives, right?

I have a confession to make; we are going to speak about only two verses in Ephesians today… that’s all you’re getting. If you feel ‘jipped’, please show up on Sunday for some preaching that’s far better than what you’re getting now! I further confess that you’re going to get a strong message about what God expects from us as Christians, with the added note that we are to lead in this regard in our homes… by example.

So, here we are in the middle of Paul’s preaching on how we ought to live, and, taking up in verse three of Chapter 5 we read, “..sexual immorality and all impurity of covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints”.  We are saints! Isn’t that cool!? Now, I know what you’re saying… “I know Ron pretty well and I can’t speak for the rest of these jokers, but he’s no saint”. Here, Christ has declared us saints and then sent the Holy Spirit to dwell in us, giving us the strength to live as saints. Paul extends a bit of grace to the Ephesians (and to each of us) by calling them “saints”. Paul states that sexual immorality should not exist among the saints. Sounds pretty obvious, doesn’t it? I can already hear some of you thinking, “I don’t sleep with other women, I’m good”, or, “I am a ‘normal guy’ in this regard, not extra kinky or anything”. I don’t suppose that our view changes if we bring in Christ’s view that thinking about sex with a woman is a sin, just as performing the act would be? Not convinced? Okay, let’s “rise above” the laiety and focus only on clergy for a moment. Leadership Journal did an anonymous survey on sex and the American clergy. Of the pastors responding to the survey, 20 percent said they looked at sexually oriented media at least once a month! 38% said they actively fantasized about sex with someone other than their spouse more than once monthly. When asked if in their church ministry if they had even done anything they felt was sexually inappropriate, 23 percent answered yes! When asked about physical infidelity, 12 percent of pastors answered, “yes”, after entering the ministry. When the laity were asked the same questions, the rates almost doubled, across the board. This indicates – to me – that leaders have an issue looking clearly into the mirror and confronting themselves and their sin. Let me give you a bit of a secret about that study. It was done more than twenty years ago, before the advent of the Internet. What do you think the rates are now?

Paul then goes on to talk about greed, and it may seem as though this is out of place, but greed has a great deal to do with sexual immorality. Greed is an appetite for something more, always. Sexual immorality is us ‘acting out’ on this desire for more. Covetousness is greed applied to something another person already has. There was a time that advertising companies would give an honest overview of a product they were proud of and compete for market share. I worked in advertising before coming to Wausau, and we didn’t care if our product was a great one, only that our advertisement was present once we successfully made people dissatisfied with what they had. All we had to do was awaken greed in a person, and have our ad in front of them when it happened.

God’s standard for behavior and sin are absolute, and Paul states that even a hint of these things must not exist among the believers. With the statistics we’ve heard and the knowledge of the truth, it’s clear that strong medicine is needed. In order to raise children that are moral and behave in a saintly manner, we must each act in that manner. Children’s behavior is more ‘caught’ than ‘taught’. We must remove from our homes every form of immorality and every hint of sex and greed. I challenge you each to do the following this evening. Sit down – as a family – around the dining room table with your DVD, music, or media file collection in the middle. Then, read Philippians 4:8 aloud and separate the movies into two piles, one to keep and one to toss. Each time you find yourself rationalizing a movie with a phrase like, “there are a couple ‘things’ in it, but it has a good story or moral”, place that movie in the “toss” pile. The way we explain this to our kids is as follows. We all like brownies, right? I’ve made some brownies, chocolately and thick… still warm, and I have some ice cream to go with them; want some? Inevitably they yell, “yes”! And we say, “ah, just one more thing… in all of this chocolatey goodness, we’ve mixed in just a teeny bit of cat poop… but don’t worry, there not much bad stuff and overall, the brownies taste really good”! Their faces fall, and they walk away… every time. Cat poop isn’t the loss of our reward after arriving in heaven, and yet we have a stronger reaction to it… wow.

Why do I think that this verse speaks so strongly about a zero tolerance for these things? Well, beyond the simple and clear language used, the next verse brings it home in a big way… let’s cover verse four; “Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving”. The word for ‘filth’ here is the same root as “disgraceful” and means anything about which we ought to feel shame. The word “moron” comes from the word that is translated “foolish talk” and in this context does not mean someone who is mentally deficient, but a person who is morally deficient. Crude joking means “to turn easily”, or, to have a quick comeback. Again, in context, this means a quick comeback of a sexual nature. The ability to turn anything into something sexual should not be a skill of ours. We don’t joke about sex for the same reason we don’t joke about God… it’s a sacred subject.  God’s standard is absolute and it includes moral purity in thought, speech, and behavior.

So, how do we do it? At the end of verse four we see that the opposite of greed and lust is to give thanks. What does giving thanks have to do with purity? Remember when I said that to trigger greed we had to become dissatisfied with what we have? A person that is giving thanks doesn’t have the time or inclination to be dissatisfied. A thankful person is inoculated against greed. Eve was tempted because she was made to be dissatisfied with “everything but the forbidden fruit”. If we complain about the job we have, the wife we have, and so on; we are not merely dissatisfied, but we are questioning God’s wisdom and sovereignty in our lives! Do you trust God, or don’t you? Let us focus on giving thanks for what we have, the fact that we are in the Light, and live as though we are.

WDYSTIA?

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In Matthew 16:15, after asking the rather oblique question, “Who do others say that I am?”, Christ asked the disciples, “Who do you say that I am”?

A recent Barna Group research study revealed that less than 9% of all adult Americans have a “biblical worldview”*. In addition, only 19% of “Born again Christians”** have a biblical worldview. Interestingly, these percentages have remained unchanged for almost 15 years.

Among young adults (the “Mosaic” generation, ages 18 to 23), the percentage of people with a biblical worldview is less than one-half of one percent, as compared to near 1 out of every nine older adults***.

What do numbers like these mean to Christians, to our nation, and to parents and youth? Click through to read more…

To get a picture of what this number means, let’s imagine you – the dedicated reader – as a community college instructor at a large college and that you teach five classes a day of a common elective. At 08:00, two hundred students file in to your room and ‘learn’ for 50 minutes. A front row of young eyes fifteen people across, and thirteen or 14 rows deep. At 09:00 this repeats, then 10:00, 11:00 and 13:00. One thousand young adults throughout each weekday, watching you and listening; taking what you say and processing it.

How many of those students entered that room and listened to what you taught through the filter of a biblical worldview? Five or less. One in every class. In that sea of faces, only ONE young person looked at their instructor and filtered every word and concept through a filter of ancient God-given wisdom that was intended for our betterment. And we wonder! We wonder why youth seems ‘lost’ and afraid, always compensating for something unseen. We wonder why suicide rates are up, why school shootings happen, and why there is so much personal pain in the world as a result of poor choices.

Every time I speak about numbers like these, well-meaning (and perhaps defensive) parents say, “Oh yes, but it’s common while youth are ‘finding themselves’ to question their faith. They will ‘come back’ and believe”. They then quote Proverbs 22:6, secure in the knowledge that the child “will return when he or she is older”. Two points there, first, we already know – from this same study – that only one of nine adults ‘come back’, and my second is related, and that is, “Come back to what”? Other Barna studies have also pointed out that a persons worldview is primarily shaped and is firmly in place by the time someone reaches the age of 13; it is refined through experience during the teen and early adult years; and then it is passed on to others during their adult life. Such studies underscore the necessity of parents and other influencers being intentional in how they help develop the worldview of children.

Worldview has a dramatic influence on a persons choices in any given situation. Research indicates that there are unusually large differences in behavior related to matters such as media use, profanity, gambling, alcohol use, honesty, civility, and sexual choices where one worldview vs. another is concerned.

Barna put it best when he said, “There are several troubling patterns to take notice of. First, although most Americans consider themselves to be Christian and say they know the content of the Bible, less than one out of ten Americans demonstrate such knowledge through their actions. Second, the generational pattern suggests that parents are not focused on guiding their children to have a biblical worldview. One of the challenges for parents, though, is that you cannot give what you do not have, and most parents do not possess such a perspective on life. That raises a third challenge, which relates to the job that Christian churches, schools and parachurch ministries are doing in Christian education. Finally, even though a central element of being a Christian is to embrace basic biblical principles and incorporate them into one’s worldview, there has been no change in the percentage of adults or even born again adults in the past 13 years regarding the possession of a biblical worldview”.

Are you learning every day? Do you pass on what you learn? Do you LIVE what you learn so those around you can be affected by it? Are you part of a church that helps you mature in correct biblical learning (orthodoxy) and then mentors you and holds you accountable while you live it (orthopraxy)? You cannot give what you do not have, and there are a majority of people in our country who THIRST for more, and can be given nothing, because most of us have nothing to give.

I challenge you today; hit your knees, ask the Lord to fill your cup, and then pour it out on others. Rinse and Repeat.

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DEFINITIONS

*For the purposes of this survey, a “biblical worldview” was defined as believing that absolute moral truth exists; the Bible is totally accurate in all of the principles it teaches; Satan is considered to be a real being or force, not merely symbolic; a person cannot earn their way into Heaven by trying to be good or do good works; Jesus Christ lived a sinless life on earth; and God is the all-knowing, all-powerful creator of the world who still rules the universe today. In the research, anyone who held all of those beliefs was said to have a biblical worldview.

**For the purposes of this survey, these are people who said they have made a personal commitment to Jesus Christ that is important in their life today and that they are certain that they will go to Heaven after they die only because they confessed their sins and accepted Christ as their savior.

***The other group that possessed a below average likelihood of holding a biblical worldview were those people that describe themselves as liberal on social and political matters (also less than one-half of one percent).

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This message isn’t about whether or not you hide and search for eggs, or enjoy sweet treats on this holiday. Frankly, hiding things, searching for things, finding things, and tasting something sweet are all enjoyable things to do. My question is, “What are we focused on as we perform our activities on a daily basis, not only at Easter, but year round”?

Are you hiding something? From others, from God? What in our lives should we be bringing into the Light of Day, to be given to God and forsaken and forgiven? What should we be freed from that has a hold on us?

Are you searching for something that you haven’t yet found? Perhaps you attend a church, but you don’t yet feel like a member of the body of Christ? Perhaps you have walked with the Lord for many years, but you are struggling right now under the weight of this world and its attacks? Perhaps you are looking for a friend or companion to help and encourage you.

Have you found what you are looking for? Do you know that you have it, and that it will never leave? Are you assured that you have it, secure in that knowledge, and growing every day into His image?

If you are secure, walking in the Lord, growing with Him every day… are you taking JOY in the journey? Is there a song in your heart and on your lips? Can others not help but see the joy of the Lord shining through your eyes and in your life?

Too many times we are overtaken by the “here and now”, the temporal; but the power that raised Christ from the grave is ours, and it guarantees those that are saved that they will be with the Lord forever. Think about that for a moment: the power that raised Christ from the dead.. is yours. I don’t just mean the power to resist eating that extra Cadbury egg (trademarked), the power to avoid saying that short word to your spouse, or the power to deal with a child that is emotional at the moment, or even the power to overcome every sin on this earth; I mean, the awesome, heavenly power that brought our Lord back from the dead. (Romans 8:11, 1 Peter 1:3-7, Ephesians 1:17-21)

Technorati Tags: bunny, easter, he is risen, open tomb

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Here are the four major reasons I believe that we have school shootings:

1. No consequences
We have created a society in the United States that allows a ridiculous amount of irresponsible action before any consequences are felt, and even then they are reduced to a mere fraction of what ‘life’ would do to someone naturally. When you are raised in an environment where no correction is given regularly – in little ways – you don’t learn what you “should” and “should not” do. Our capability for deviance from reasonable action becomes larger as we get older and without this regular course correction, a child can end up with sloppy impulse control and a failure to mature.

2. No respect for life
We tell our kids that they evolved from a puddle of goo and that they are animals like any other. We tell them that nothing makes humans special save their ability to reason and that simple evolutionary processes over millions of years resulted in our intelligence and ability to seem like we have this thing some silly religious types call a “soul”. We call it “sentience” so that we can devalue it’s real import. We kill our children in the womb with regularity and tell each other this is somehow “more caring” than raising it. Our personal wants and desires are more important than a life. With this we prove that life is accidental, a mere happenstance of chance and that it is not precious; it is not something to revere or protect.

3. No right and wrong
Since religious people are a bunch of whackjobs that need something outside themselves (when there really IS nothing), we tell our kids that every belief in any “god” is the same crutch as every other and that anything you “choose to believe” is right. Morals change as society changes and the majority of people’s actions select what is “right”. “Right” is only a definition and it changes with the ebb and flow of human choice. Since there is no truth, and no “right”, the corollary is quickly figured by the child and nothing is viewed as “wrong”.

4. No Love
Many children today are raised by parents that have bought into points 1-3 above and that add a great deal of selfishness to the mix. These children have no “time” with mom or dad and therefore do not feel “loved” in any real way. There is no-one that cares for them, and this feeling is hyper-injected with hormone fuel at puberty, pushing many teens into a black depression. This results in young adults that know the world is cold and does not care what happens to them.

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So, we have a child that feels that no one cares, that places no value on life, that thinks everything is “fine” to do, and that has never practiced denying themselves anything. Add to this mixture a pile of racing thoughts and hormones, and I cannot believe that there are not MORE shootings!

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So, faced with this dire situation, we ask, “What shall we do”? In short, we must reverse each point above. My personal opinion on how to do this appears below. Please understand that I know that both the problem and the solution are not four simple steps, but I do believe that these four things are fundamental to our success.

A. Parents should give their children consequences for incorrect action on a consistent and age-appropriate basis from a very young age. As a child matures, so do the consequences and as the child’s capacity to understand increases, so do the explanations of what these actions might bring in the world outside the home and why, “we don’t do that”. Society should then change to allow all citizens to feel the consequences of their own actions. If you don’t want to work, you don’t eat. If you want to live off of others and thieve to do that, you’ll end up working anyway; on a chain gang.

B. We should teach respect for life from a young age as well, by putting each other above ourselves and teaching that life is a gift from God, given to both the animals and man by God Himself. We should teach children that we are above the animals and are to care for them, but that God made us in His image and therefore we each have infinite significance as children of the King. Christ would have died for any ONE of us, and that makes our lives significant! We must then change society to reflect the view that life is important by protecting each other from those that would take life. This would come in the form of protecting life and limb and extending that basic right to children yet in the womb. We cannot tell children to put another before themselves and then put our convenience ahead of the lives of the unborn.

C. There is truth, and we should teach that to our children. Our God lives today and is active in our lives and on this earth. Children should be taught about faith, God, and how best to glorify Him; and then watch as their parents model that behavior. As Americans, we need to get over this misplaced and hyper-extended notion of a separation between church and state and begin to teach the truths that our forefathers recognized, that all rights come from God Himself and that He has given us the definition between “right” and “wrong”. Truth exists, and we should recognize it, teach it, and live it.

D. Does it not go without saying that if there is love that there will be less violence? We should love our children. I don’t mean that we should have “warm feelings” inside toward them, but we should LOVE, as a choice and as a verb. Place yourself aside as a parent and spend time with your children. Work alongside them, talk to them, listen to them, and give them a home in which they can emote and still be safe and protected. Teach them then to love as they have been loved. Explain to them what love is and means, don’t assume they “just know”. Explain what it takes to make interpersonal relationships work. Ensure that they understand that they can control only themselves and that they should love without expecting emotion in return. Tell them how they can do this because God does this with each of us, and as children of the King, we can do this for each other.

Will these things stop school shootings? Perhaps not entirely, but children that have been raised as I describe in an America as I describe will very likely be innoculated against that type of behavior from a young age.

Technorati Tags: children, ethics, gun, morals, parenting, school shootings, teaching

4% of men ages 16-24 in America attend church regularly.

Since the Industrial Revolution, the involvement of men in the church has declined in a cyclical pattern, but with a steady pace. What will a church with no men look like? The world gives us some answer today, in that more and more children are being raised without a father in their lives. Did you know that over 28% of children in America today are being raised without a father in the home? Did you know that in the African-American community that this number jumps to 63% ? The impact of this is recognized in our sinful world, but we’ve refused to see the implications for our church. A son who is absent a father between the ages of 14 and 22 has his risk of incarceration increase 5% for every year he lives without a father. Children who live in a home without a father are 32% more likely to smoke, drink, or use illegal drugs than children in a two-parent home. Girls raised without a father present have sex for the first time an average of 1.6 years earlier than girls raised with a father present. It is clear, even in secular society, that father-presence is critical. What about our church?
Statistics show that if a child is brought to church regularly throughout his childhood by its mother, and the father does not attend, that the likelihood of that child attending church regularly as an adult is around 2%. If the father takes the children to church, that percentage jumps to 33%.

Folks, God has given men the call to spiritually lead their families. I don’t pretend to know why spirituality has been designed to be passed on by men, but I read Scripture that says that it has and the numbers bear it out in practice. I also see that men are leading at an ever declining rate and that leadership cannot be based only on speech, but on practice. Brennan Manning says, “The greatest cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who claim Christ with their lips, and then walk out the door and deny Him with their lifestyle”.  Learning is a wonderful thing, but I am already educated well beyond my obedience. We must do what God reveals to us in His word as we read and pray; learning it isn’t enough.

Deut 6:4-9 gives a wonderful overview of what it takes to pass on spiritual concepts and a more complete picture of our Savior to your family. Jewish culture at that time had a son learning a trade from his father and women working together in the home all day, every day. That kind of dedicated time made for an environment where a father’s actions were seen and mimicked on a more regular basis than today. Now a child only sees Dad when he gets home from work, grumpy and snapping at Mom, and that’s what they emulate. Let it not be so in our homes. Men, we must model a good relationship for our children. The way you treat your wife is the way that your son will treat his wife, and the way that your daughters will accept treatment from a man. Do you realize how powerful that is? I know you might be the “big dog” at work, and have the ability to change some things there, but in your daily example to your children, you have the power to change the world.

I just returned from a men’s conference in Elmbrook, WI called “No Regrets”, A Life of Significance. This conference had 5,000 men gathering to fellowship, learn, and share about the Christian life as a man. What does a life of “No Regrets” look like? In 1 Cor 3:11-15 we read about a man building a life on the foundation of Jesus Christ, and that the Day will bring his work to light. In verse 15 we read about a life of regrets, “..he will be saved, but only as a man escaping through the flames”. A life of No Regrets ends with the words, “Well done thou good and faithful servant, enter now into the glory of thy Maker”. A life of significance is a life spent on service, focused on bringing others closer to Him and preparing for heaven. A life of significance recognizes this existence as a blink between eternities and gives it that same weight in our minds. A man that is living a life of significance can be recognized, because he is doing something about it.

Men, we have been given hands to work, feet to move, and our behinds are there to hold our legs on; not to sit with. Get off your blessed assurance, rise today and lead your family in Christ, affect your place of work for Christ,  and train yourself into the heart of God through prayer and reading the Word. In 2028 my son will be 31, and if we as Christian men commit to living lives of significance, we will still be in a vibrant and healthy church, full of men living lives of example in the power of the Lord.

“Wherever you go, preach Christ; and if necessary, use words” – Francis of Assisi

Technorati Tags: husband, men, spiritual leadership

First, when someone comes to me with a problem in their life, I always ask them to stop looking out the window for the problem, and first look into the mirror for the problem. We can only change ourselves, and there are plenty of issues right there to deal with. I looked into the mirror and saw a man that was willing to pick the speck out of another’s eye, while ignoring the 2×4 in his own. I saw a man who – like the rest of society – was dazzled by bright and shiny things put forth by the media that are – almost assuredly – designed to make us stop looking in the mirror at our own issues. Why is reality TV and “bad news” so interesting? Because it fools us into thinking, “I am not like that person, so I am ok”. This is the very attitude that Christ condemned when speaking about the Pharisees. It was time to examine myself and why I had strong opinions on someone else’s sin.

Second, we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. It is just fate that has us toiling away in relative obscurity – with all the sins of Jamie Lynn and more – quietly and behind the scenes, with no cameras to capture our every fault. I guarantee you, if I had a camera watching me during every moment from the age of 8 or 9 on, I couldn’t show my face in public now! Isn’t it wonderful that we can hide our sin while we snipe at another’s? Makes you feel great that you don’t have “that” sin, doesn’t it? Or maybe you do/did, but you pick at Lynn Spears (their mother) for poor parenting, without knowing how – ultimately – your own children will turn out? We have all the sins others have, and frankly, if you really really hate Jamie Lynn, you must not be too far from her, because it takes similarity to breed proper hate. You cannot hate something you don’t personally understand.

Finally, I ask all of us, “Where is the man”!? Where is the 19 year-old male who has been having sex with a 16 year-old and committing (at least) a misdemeanor while doing so? Where is the father who was to teach Jamie what a good man looks like and how to demand more out of a man than a house and sexual activity? Am I raising my daughters in such a way that they will select a good man – from the precious few that there are – and will have an “order” to courting, marriage, child-creating, and child-raising? Am I raising my son to be a man that will cast aside his need for quick sexual release – as strong as that need can be – for his beloved as they court and marry? Am I raising my son to resist the sin of apathy and inaction; Adam’s sin in the garden? Am I fostering in him the desire and instinct to protect, rather than take advantage of; and to love unselfishly, rather than take what he can get?

To all of you who took up stones to cast at J.L.S., please drop them and go home. There’s nothing to see here; nothing that is, that you cannot already see in your ordinary home mirror. That is all..

While I was hunting and watching football over the last week, my dear wife’s project was to repaint and redecorate, our middle daughter’s room (which her mother, Laura, had stripped and repaired). She did that, with some help from our daughter, and the results are cute! But.. this wasn’t just a repainting job…

As my wife finished the painting and was cleaning up the room, she began to notice some smudges on the woodwork from the painting, and wiped those up. She then noticed that some of the furniture wasn’t clean, and wiped that down. She rearranged the room, put up pretty curtains, redid the closet, hung a closet rod, and put a dresser in the closet; but when she was “done” with the room, something still wasn’t right.

As my wife poked through some of the things in Liesel’s room, she noticed that there were dirty clothes here and there. She noticed that there were some toys and things of value in and among old papers, magazines, and candy wrappers.. things of value, but in with trash so that you couldn’t tell one thing from another. In fact, almost every drawer in the several dressers and containers had a mixture of clean clothes, dirty clothes, and trash! My wife carried three trash bags full out of that room when she was done cleaning, and I am not talking about the white tall ones.. I mean the Hefty large black ones. Now the room was completely tidy, with everything in its place.

Will the room stay this way? Not magically, but Liesel was SO grateful for a “new room” that she has vowed to keep it clean by working a bit each day and changing her habits so that she can keep her room as clean as it is right now; right after Mommy made it beautiful and new.

Readers, I’d like to suggest that Liesel’s Room is much like our heart when Christ comes in. Often, we are saved and things change quickly and dramatically, like the room being repainted; but there are still many hidden areas – areas that we aren’t even sure exist – that needs cleaning and only someone with experience can help us identify these and work them out with our Lord. This is why the community of believers is so important!

Once our hearts are clean, we must keep them that way, because if we don’t, more dirt and grime will rush in than before! (Luke 11:24-26) An accountability partner, daily prayer, and daily study are excellent ways to ensure that there is no room for the evil one to enter into our shiny new heart!

Finally, just as Liesel will have to spend a few minutes each morning polishing up her room, we must hit our knees and give our hearts over to the Lord – completely – every morning we awaken. Only in this way will they stay clean and shiny.

Several things struck me about the trip, and I’ll relate just a few here. First, when we found our seats, the fans around us were incredibly nice and everyone talked together, laughing and joking.. very good natured. By the 3rd quarter however, the mood had changed. Now there were braggarts, loud folks – men and women alike – that were throwing curse words around, yelling at the coaches, and generally misbehaving. This was with the Packers winning the game. So,what might make a person act this differently? The answer is simple; a lack of temperance and the ready presence of alcohol. The game is every bit as fun to watch with one beer in you as it is with five. The difference is, with one beer in you, the game might continue to be fun to watch for everyone around you!

The second thing I’ll comment on is a comment RJ made to me when we first arrived; “Dad, are you sure that’s the right field? That doesn’t look anywhere near as big as the one on TV”. Isn’t it that way with many things in our lives? We desire and pant after a thing that we think will make such a HUGE difference to us, and when we finally get it, we find that wanting was so much better a thing than having. We, rather, should stand with Paul who said that he was always comfortable because he had learned to be content in all circumstances (Phil 4:11).

Finally, the Packer began this game “shaky”. Brett Favre was not “on” with most of his early passes and it seemed almost like pure luck that we got a couple of first downs. Once a few series were behind the Pack however, their confidence increased and they established the run and began throwing the long ball. As the game continued in their favor, they picked apart the pass defense of the Vikings and ran the ball right over them in addition (first 100-yd game allowed by the Vikings all season). It’s the same in our spiritual lives. We cannot expect to “throw the long ball” until we have established a relationship and pattern of success in our Christian lives. We cannot expect to see results on one big prayer if we haven’t given God the opportunity to build our confidence and faith in Him by praying again and again about little things, and looking for the answers to those prayers.

As we look forward to the ride down with a couple of other guys, and begin to look forward at the matchup between the two teams, we see the parallels between the game and our spiritual walk…

Disclaimer: These parallels have little to do with the personalities and team affinity we each may have. Ignore those aspects please.

The Packers have a wily old veteran who has clearly lost a step in his speed and footwork, and those were slow to begin with. This veteran has a rocket arm however, and a couple of fair receivers. He has played more games, thrown more touchdowns, and had more victories and defeats than possibly anyone else on either side of the ball. The Packers have a strong run defense with an anchor defensive end and good linebackers.

The Vikings have a rookie running back that is full of talent. He has already broken a rushing yardage per game record and has incredible potential.The Vikings however, are even more one-dimensional than the Packers. While the Packers have run the ball a few times this season, no fantasy player would start the Vikings QB unless they were playing in a “point per handoff to the RB” league. The Vikings can only run the ball. Add to this the fact that the Vikings pass defense is porous and ranks near the bottom of the NFL.
This means that the Vikings will run their strength against the strength of the Packers, and that the Packers will be attacking the weakness of the Vikings. Which do you think the devil does? It is true that the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour; and this means he certainly can attack us in our human strength and win. It is also written, “resist the devil and he will flee”, which seems to indicate that we can stand and fight the devil in the strength of the Lord and be victorious, but I’d like to suggest that the devil most often works against us in those things that we are most vulnerable to. That is, Satan takes our natural weaknesses and uses those to manipulate us. He often uses these things to cause us to sin, but he can also use these things to make us feel unworthy and depressed, and in that state, we cannot take joy in and glorify our Lord, and that’s what Satan desires. You see, Satan wants God dead, and since he can’t do anything to God, he comes after his children, those created “in His image”. Satan wants to separate us from God, and it really doesn’t matter to him how he gets that done, as long as he gets it done.

I’d suggest that we take the high ground early. Study, pray, fast, journal, meditate, have an accountability partner; do all the things necessary to train for battle. Then, when confronted on a battleground not of your choosing, or in an area where you are particularly weak, don’t fight, RUN! Avoid fighting on ground where you are at a disadvantage. Put plans in place to avoid those battlegrounds. If you are an alcoholic, don’t go to parties where there will be alcohol. If you are prone to lust, don’t go to witness on a beach in south Florida.

If you don’t know what “spiritual discipline” is, or how to start; drop me a line and I’ll be happy to chat you through my basic knowledge of it or seek out your pastor or priest, and ask him about training, instead of trying.

Oh, and, GO PACK!

The husband in this example was controlling, petty, and dismissive and the rules of the home did not apply to him but were liberally applied to all others. I would suggest that this man is in all of us, and I would exhort men to stand up and be more than a male. Be what God designed you to be, for Him, for your wife, for your church, and for your children…

Men today don’t know a lot of things. They are not being raised with any sense of “manhood” (what it means to be a man). We try to make our little boys act like little girls, and when they don’t, we give them Ritalin and sit them in the front of the class and hold them in from recess. Worse than this, we don’t tell boys when “manhood” begins. There is no rite of passage, no understanding of, “From this day forth, you shall be considered a man”. Childhood used to last until age 18 (maximum), now – for many men – it lasts through a young man’s 20′s and into his 30′s. How many of you have spoken with women who’s sons still live in the basement at age 29, playing video games for a living? “Johnny’s still at home, but we’re praying for him”. He doesn’t need only prayer, he needs Dad to drag him outside and make him work!

How is it that we are not teaching our sons to be men? Well, I’d posit that there are two primary reasons for this. First, we don’t spend any time with them and second, we don’t know how to be men ourselves. It once was that a son would apprentice with his father (or another man) and would learn alongside them about the trade, and as a result, would also pick up critical things about what a man does all day, how he acts, and how he treats others. Today, we run off to work and our son goes to school. When our boy comes home he sits in front of the TV or a video game while we engage in our hobby without him or go work out at the gym. This teaches little Johnny how to live in Mom’s basement later on, not how to become a man! We don’t know how to be men because we’re the first generation raised wholly in a post-modern world. Even if you were raised by solid parents, the world has eaten at you, claiming its apathetic margin at every stage of your life, telling you that every belief is equal, and children should be allowed to run free and do as they like. You don’t know how to raise a man because your past didn’t make you into one!

What does your wife need? I don’t mean, “What’s your perception of what you needy wife whines about all the time”? I mean, what does the creature to whom you’ve pledged to have and to hold, to cherish… what does she NEED!? Do you hold her face in your hands, gently stroke her hair, talk with her gently about life, love, and your children? Or do you leer at her, rolling your eyes when she asks you to remove your shoes in the mud room, chuckle under your breath and find secret enjoyment when the kids misbehave to her? Do you sacrifice for her, picking up around the house, making her tea in the evening, helping make the bed in the morning, looking for what burdens you can remove from her or do you plop down in front of the TV when you get home and look for someone, anyone, to bring you a drink? When she wants to do a certain thing around the house, make an expenditure,etc. do you mock or control her? Or do you revel in the fact that you have a capable and brave wife that handles her household with grace and courage?

Men, our wives need us, but they don’t need what we’ve become; they need what God created us to be. They need kings that will treat them like queens, they need warriors that will treat them with gentleness and kindness, they need friends that will listen and care, and they need partners that will shoulder the emotional burdens of life together with them. Care for your wives men… that does not mean, “bring home a check”, the active verb is “care”. First care for her, and then – through daily action – care for her. Protect her heart and champion her cause and I promise you, you’ll begin to see a queen that is radiant and fulfilled.

What do your kids need? They need presence. They need to see you live life, interacting with others and making decisions. They need specific training, yes; but more important is to let them see who you are as you live life as a man. Your daughters need touching, love, and time. If you don’t give them this often, they will soon find another male to give it to them, and trust me when I tell you that you don’t want that. Your sons need to understand what work is, what sacrifice is, and why we do both of these things. Both genders need to understand our view of – and relationship to – God and what “life” looks like outside the family. Your children should be able to express emotion in a safe environment and should know that no matter what they do, they are still your child and that you love them (this does not make a statement about consequence).

Men, this is a country filled with guys who don’t have great adventure in life; they watch them in movies. Men don’t play many sports anymore, they watch football on TV. Men don’t take the time and energy to be lovers to their wives, they watch porn on the internet. Men don’t live life in their role 24 hours a day anymore, they go to work, come home and go into a TV or computer world, expecting their wives to pick up the “slack”. I encourage you not to be this man! 

So, how do we do it? Simple. We stamp out only three things and add one. The three are, lust, pride, and selfishness. That’s it, three little things. (for those of you who don’t know me, this would be tongue-in-cheek humor).

Lust
This one is a killer fellas. It’s a part of selfishness but with guys, it needs its own little category (and coffin). Your wife whom the Lord gave you and with whom you should take your joy, is the only woman that you should be expending any emotional energy on. You’ve all seen sitcoms or movies where the man puts a centerfold up on the bedstead to get excited with his wife, and we laugh and say that’s pathetic, but we each do this exact same thing. If you have ever slept with a woman that is not your wife, watched a movie with pornographic content, viewed a magazine with scantily clad (or unclad) women, or lusted after another woman in your heart; it is incredibly likely that you are bringing these images to mind, and that is being unfaithful to your wife! More than this, since we’ve likely masturbated to these images or thoughts, we will bring back these memories with our wives in the moment that God designed us to be only with one another, while we are making love. Can you begin to see why pornography and pre-marital sex are a huge problem? We men are visual and we remember visually. This is not helpful when we are trying to focus on our wife. I would suggest that you drive out thoughts and images of other women, and this takes a long time to do, but it is worth it. I would further suggest that you slow your sexual pace down to a point where you do not need to conjure up images to “get excited” but are already so full of anticipation that you can focus fully on your wife without bringing other women into your mind. On another note, this pace may be more naturally in line with your wife’s pace, but we can discuss that theory another time.

Pride
You don’t always have to “win”, to be “right”, to be the “Big Dog”. Let others have their time in the sun as well. It’s your job to build self-confidence in your children, not to tear it down. You are to hold up you wife, not make her question her sanity. Stop the belittling comments and the desire to make others look bad. Instead, build others up verbally, assuming that they already are what they could become, and then watch them become that. Suck it up, and take your part of the blame (and stop there). When you are confronted with an issue in life, stop trying to find out “who’s fault it was”. Investigate only YOUR part of it and how to avoid it the next time or how you might act in a more honorable manner if faced with the same situation again.

Selfishness
Newsflash fellas, it isn’t all about you! It’s about her and the kids. Set yourself aside and look for what you can do to serve your family. If I hear even one of you complain, “I’ve had a long day at work and I deserve to sit down”, I swear I’ll come to your place and exhort you to excellence personally and vigorously. Her day started before yours and will end after yours, and she’ll give more of herself than you will. You don’t “deserve” to sit down, she does. Change your attitude and approach. Let her sit and put her feet up. Bring her tea and do the dinner dishes for her. I KNOW YOU DON’T WANT TO, THAT’S THE ENTIRE POINT!!! Set yourself aside and put her in the place she deserves, in your heart, mind, and in the home. She is your queen. As a side note, the kids quickly pick up on this and become people with servant-hearts as well.

The One Thing
This blog is heavy in “Christian” metaphor and belief, and that is because I believe that what we do here is temporary and preparatory for an eternity with He who created us. The changes suggested in this post will help any man with his wife and kids, but the real change comes when we open our hearts to the Good News, filling ourselves with the Holy Spirit and allowing Him to work in us to change us. The other three do not fall away without a fight, but you need strength to put away the old and bring in the new, and Christ will give that strength.

Cowboy up, men! There is a world full of sons that don’t know what a man is or does, daughters that are looking for love, and wives that need us to be present and accounted for. Hear the challenge and rise to it.