I started several devotions for this morning’s breakfast; a Father’s Day chat, and Memorial Day recognition, a direct and forceful talk about a Christian man and his calling, but I have been led to the book of Ephesians for today’s conversation with you. First.. a personal story. I went in recently for a consult on ADHD. I wanted to try some new treatment options, and needed to undergo an assessment with a new doctor. I sat in the waiting room for 10 or 15 minutes, tapping my foot, reading magazines, pacing… until the assistant came and took me to a room with nothing on the floor, walls, or ceiling. The only thing in the room was a rather sturdy looking desk with a monitor and a keyboard. The assistant explained that letters would flash on the screen and I was to press a key each time this happened, except when the letter “X” flashed up on the screen. I began, and the letters came, fast and furious, then slower… then fast again. Here and there I skipped the “X” when I should, but as I got into a rhythm, I found that the “X” would flash, and I’d press the key… just because I had become used to pressing the key. Then, I became incensed at myself for hitting the “X”… so upset that I would mess up the next couple of keypresses. “A” – press, “I” – press, “N” – press, “K” – press, “X” – press… D’OH!!! It seems that this is much like our life as Christians… we naturally do what we repeat. 14 minutes of that seemed like an eternity, and I am glad I didn’t take a blood pressure test soon thereafter. Take a guy with ADHD and put him in a small room, make him do one boring thing, boy I tell you… I’ll bet they had a hidden camera somewhere! Let’s see how this idea of conditioned stimulus and response applies to Paul’s writings.

So, Ephesians… are we going to talk about the fact Paul seemingly wrote Ephesians expressly to demonstrate Pastor Jeff’s [our senior pastor] continued focus on the difference between (and necessity of) orthodoxy and orthopraxy? After all, the book is split neatly in two between “how to believe” in Chapters 1 through 3 and “how to live” in Chapters 4 through 6! Perhaps we will talk about relationships and focus on the gender-specific verses from 22 through 26? It’s always nice to talk about submissive wives, right?

I have a confession to make; we are going to speak about only two verses in Ephesians today… that’s all you’re getting. If you feel ‘jipped’, please show up on Sunday for some preaching that’s far better than what you’re getting now! I further confess that you’re going to get a strong message about what God expects from us as Christians, with the added note that we are to lead in this regard in our homes… by example.

So, here we are in the middle of Paul’s preaching on how we ought to live, and, taking up in verse three of Chapter 5 we read, “..sexual immorality and all impurity of covetousness must not even be named among you, as is proper among saints”.  We are saints! Isn’t that cool!? Now, I know what you’re saying… “I know Ron pretty well and I can’t speak for the rest of these jokers, but he’s no saint”. Here, Christ has declared us saints and then sent the Holy Spirit to dwell in us, giving us the strength to live as saints. Paul extends a bit of grace to the Ephesians (and to each of us) by calling them “saints”. Paul states that sexual immorality should not exist among the saints. Sounds pretty obvious, doesn’t it? I can already hear some of you thinking, “I don’t sleep with other women, I’m good”, or, “I am a ‘normal guy’ in this regard, not extra kinky or anything”. I don’t suppose that our view changes if we bring in Christ’s view that thinking about sex with a woman is a sin, just as performing the act would be? Not convinced? Okay, let’s “rise above” the laiety and focus only on clergy for a moment. Leadership Journal did an anonymous survey on sex and the American clergy. Of the pastors responding to the survey, 20 percent said they looked at sexually oriented media at least once a month! 38% said they actively fantasized about sex with someone other than their spouse more than once monthly. When asked if in their church ministry if they had even done anything they felt was sexually inappropriate, 23 percent answered yes! When asked about physical infidelity, 12 percent of pastors answered, “yes”, after entering the ministry. When the laity were asked the same questions, the rates almost doubled, across the board. This indicates – to me – that leaders have an issue looking clearly into the mirror and confronting themselves and their sin. Let me give you a bit of a secret about that study. It was done more than twenty years ago, before the advent of the Internet. What do you think the rates are now?

Paul then goes on to talk about greed, and it may seem as though this is out of place, but greed has a great deal to do with sexual immorality. Greed is an appetite for something more, always. Sexual immorality is us ‘acting out’ on this desire for more. Covetousness is greed applied to something another person already has. There was a time that advertising companies would give an honest overview of a product they were proud of and compete for market share. I worked in advertising before coming to Wausau, and we didn’t care if our product was a great one, only that our advertisement was present once we successfully made people dissatisfied with what they had. All we had to do was awaken greed in a person, and have our ad in front of them when it happened.

God’s standard for behavior and sin are absolute, and Paul states that even a hint of these things must not exist among the believers. With the statistics we’ve heard and the knowledge of the truth, it’s clear that strong medicine is needed. In order to raise children that are moral and behave in a saintly manner, we must each act in that manner. Children’s behavior is more ‘caught’ than ‘taught’. We must remove from our homes every form of immorality and every hint of sex and greed. I challenge you each to do the following this evening. Sit down – as a family – around the dining room table with your DVD, music, or media file collection in the middle. Then, read Philippians 4:8 aloud and separate the movies into two piles, one to keep and one to toss. Each time you find yourself rationalizing a movie with a phrase like, “there are a couple ‘things’ in it, but it has a good story or moral”, place that movie in the “toss” pile. The way we explain this to our kids is as follows. We all like brownies, right? I’ve made some brownies, chocolately and thick… still warm, and I have some ice cream to go with them; want some? Inevitably they yell, “yes”! And we say, “ah, just one more thing… in all of this chocolatey goodness, we’ve mixed in just a teeny bit of cat poop… but don’t worry, there not much bad stuff and overall, the brownies taste really good”! Their faces fall, and they walk away… every time. Cat poop isn’t the loss of our reward after arriving in heaven, and yet we have a stronger reaction to it… wow.

Why do I think that this verse speaks so strongly about a zero tolerance for these things? Well, beyond the simple and clear language used, the next verse brings it home in a big way… let’s cover verse four; “Let there be no filthiness nor foolish talk nor crude joking, which are out of place, but instead let there be thanksgiving”. The word for ‘filth’ here is the same root as “disgraceful” and means anything about which we ought to feel shame. The word “moron” comes from the word that is translated “foolish talk” and in this context does not mean someone who is mentally deficient, but a person who is morally deficient. Crude joking means “to turn easily”, or, to have a quick comeback. Again, in context, this means a quick comeback of a sexual nature. The ability to turn anything into something sexual should not be a skill of ours. We don’t joke about sex for the same reason we don’t joke about God… it’s a sacred subject.  God’s standard is absolute and it includes moral purity in thought, speech, and behavior.

So, how do we do it? At the end of verse four we see that the opposite of greed and lust is to give thanks. What does giving thanks have to do with purity? Remember when I said that to trigger greed we had to become dissatisfied with what we have? A person that is giving thanks doesn’t have the time or inclination to be dissatisfied. A thankful person is inoculated against greed. Eve was tempted because she was made to be dissatisfied with “everything but the forbidden fruit”. If we complain about the job we have, the wife we have, and so on; we are not merely dissatisfied, but we are questioning God’s wisdom and sovereignty in our lives! Do you trust God, or don’t you? Let us focus on giving thanks for what we have, the fact that we are in the Light, and live as though we are.

I volunteered to work in security during the event and worked (4) 4.5 hour shifts in exchange for a full event pass. Monetarily this is the lowest hourly wage I’ve worked for in over 25 years, but these shifts were the most rewarding I had worked in that amount of time as well. I saw people already full in the joy of the Lord as they approached the gates of the event and people greeting me warmly, even with my gruff exterior and “Security” shirt. I don’t know if you’ve attended secular concerts, but we (security personnel) are rather universally hated at these events.. tolerated, but not embraced. At Lifest however, we were all there for the same reason, to fellowship with other Christians and to worship an Almighty God! As I said, it was awesome.

I camped just outside the “Edge” stage where all the “edgy” bands played. I went to sleep every night to the hardest music I’ve listened to in many years, and loved it. “Red”, “Superchick”, and, “Disciple”… great slumber music, right!? I took the bike with a week’s worth of camping equipment, and loved every minute of it. I got more sun in one week than I may have ever gotten, and got rained on one night… a lot. Normally I’m not one that’s much for people, but – in general – the people here were a great group, of the same mind and all focused on God. We weren’t all the same, in fact we were all very different, but God isn’t glorified the most when we are the same and get along; God is the most glorified when people that are totally different one from the other are friendly and loving members of His family together. That happened here at Lifest 2009.

My family came down and had a hotel for two nights in town. I was able to stand in a crowd of thousands and worship with each one of my three children individually, and with my wife. Standing and singing with a crowd for ten or twenty thousand to David Crowder was great, holding Kassie and singing to Phillips, Craig, and Dean in worship to our Lord was special, bouncing to Toby Mac with Liesel was fun (I think?),sitting with my wife during a Campolo talk was relaxing, and making shapes with the Rubik snake with R.J. filled some off time. I recommend this event to families for “together time”… make it one of your camping trips for the year; that’s what we’ll be doing next year. One note: If you are going to volunteer, do it together and on the same shifts (if possible).

So, you know it’s coming… what are we to learn from an event like this? I suggest that there are three things that an event like this can demonstrate and that we can learn from.

Christians are Individuals

It is an obvious statement that we are all different. Here’s the piece that we often miss as Christians; that’s a good thing! God made us different, has gifted us in various ways, and has called us to a wide array of places in His body, the church. Let me be painfully clear, because I can hear an Elder Board somewhere saying, “Well yes, but our walk will be parallel and much alike because we’re on a narrow path together, and… mutter mutter”.. our Christian walk can also vary widely and still be valid, effective, and sanctifying. Yes, you read me correctly… our walk can look different from another Christian’s and still be “valid”. Who are we to judge another’s walk!? (which is what Matthew 7:1 really means).. we are to bear one another’s burdens, to support one another, and yet not to judge. Yes, the fruits of the Spirit (Gal 5:22) must be present in each Christian’s life, but too often we use that verse to overcome and subjugate the verse on judging so that we can feel justified in judging! People of God, STOP IT! We are each in enough difficulty with our own walk in faith to take the time and energy to judge another. Take what little spiritual strength you have remaining and look in the mirror, and then connect to God… stop looking out the window at others.

Worship Varies in Style

Ah yes, the Worship Wars.. the “Vietnam” of the church. The conflict we never should have been in that takes our focus off so many other critical things, that destroys Christian relationships, tears down local churches, and erodes our sense of history as a church. Folks far smarter than I have attempted to quantify – and then solve – this issue and have failed. It won’t be solved here, but I’ll still write about it!

Just as we each are different – radically so in some cases – in our walk, so are we different in our form of worship to the Lord. Now, many of us can believe that some distance away from our own personal style is “still valid” service to the Lord, but we all have that threshold, don’t we? That place where we say something like, “P.C.D. and Aaron Shust are where we all need to be, and I can believe that the Barlow Girls can be worshipped to, but Disciple and Kutless are just noise… no one can really worship to THAT”. Can’t they? Let me give you a piece of trivia from Lifest… I heard Disciple, and I heard their gospel message. I couldn’t help it because it permeated their performance. That “hard rock band” gave the most effective and heartfelt altar call of any of the 150 bands at Lifest. Worship happened, and it happened whether our frail human minds can wrap around it or not. God was glorified, and many youth came to Christ that night. Stop bleeding off energy that could be spent sanctifying yourself, serving the Lord, and serving His people by judging how other parts of the body of Christ worship. Ask the Lord if YOUR worship is effective and glorifying, and spend your energy worshipping the way He has called you to.

I have a poster in my office at work… it’s very simple, I printed it myself. It has the Greek character “Delta” with a picture of a heart next to it. “Delta” is the Greek character that in physics is used to denote “change”… and God desires us not to worship externally, in form only; He desires heart change. All true worship demands a response from the Christian. Sometimes this begins with closed eyes, with hands raised to God, with jumping, and even with tongues, but this emotional 20-30 minutes isn’t where it ends, or even begins. We are recharged by worshipping in community, but we must understand that this short time should be an outpouring and sharing of a life of worship, of a life born of a changed heart. True worship demands a response in the life of the believer, indeed, that change… living for Christ IS worship.

Concentrate on the Core

Several times immediately prior to the event, and even at the event, I heard statements made about the theology of the people “in charge” of the event (as if it wasn’t the Lord that was in charge). Christians, remember a few paragraphs ago when I exhorted you to “stop it”? I’m saying it again. Do me a favor and grab a Bible… turn to 1 Cor 12, yes, the one right before the Love Chapter. Paul is speaking about gifts, and he’s talking about how each part of the body does something different, isn’t he? Well sure Ron, but you see, this chapter is focused on individuals and not on “denominations”… these verses cannot be applied to denominations in today’s Christianity. No? Hang out on verse 13 for a minute… yes, the whole “same spirit” spot, “..whether Jews or Greeks, slave or free..”, wow… large divisions of population, not individuals. It doesn’t get much different than “Jew” and “Greek”… and in case they missed that division, Paul went on to state that two totally opposed populations (slave and free) also were of the same Spirit. If the organizers of an event have the Gospel, are they not part of the body? Is it not better that people connect to them than no one?

As far as “essentials” go, I won’t take the space to write on those here, but suffice it to say that they are not as numerous in God’s eyes as they are in ours. The body of Christ, His church, is made up of all people that are saved, those that have accepted His gift of salvation, claimed the name, and have been indwelled by the Holy Spirit; full stop. Stop dividing the body with internecine battles; we are called to unity and we shall find it on the Gospel alone.

As you can see, I can get carried up in this pretty quickly, and this event really renewed my Spirit and vigor. I recommend it (and like events) to all Christians, especially families.

Technorati Tags: festival, gospel, lifest, music, worship

The two younger kids are in California with their grandparents, and on Saturday, Justina had an all-day scrapbooking event in Minocqua. Kassie and I decided to go on a little ride together and went out Evergreen, past Chico’s to Eau Clarie Dells. We had some soft-serve, walked a bit, looked at some of God’s awesome nature, pushed Kassie on the park swings, came back through town, picked up cat food, and had a late lunch at Taco Bell. We followed this with some yardwork (mowing) and when Justina got home we grilled steaks. 60 miles of riding and some quality time with my eldest. It was a good day!

Sunday came and we went to church, me on the bike, Kassie and Justina in the Cherokee. I stopped by a friend’s house and fed his chickens, hit a small patch of rain, and made it to church on time. After church, Justina and I hopped on the bike and waved goodbye to Kassie who was headed for an empty house.. just Kassie and the dog for a day of alone time. Justina and I rode with a couple of friends to the local Harley dealership in time for the start of their first annual ‘dealer ride’. I’ve included our route below.

Justina and I ride well together, and we learn something new every time we ride. This time out we learned that she still gets antsy near the paint, and that popping her gum in my ear when we’re riding is distracting. I learned that stopping distances are greater with a passenger (I knew that but had it proven to me) and that this distance increases appreciably with water on the roadway. On that note; we traveled through a few impressive rain squalls. Hard rain at 60mph on a sunburned head feels like hail!

We had a successful ride, maybe 165 miles, had a great time, good fellowship (thanks Mike and Mitch!), and even got some coffee in! In fact, it was such a great time that I think I’ll ride home early this evening and take Justina on another ride.
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WDYSTIA?

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In Matthew 16:15, after asking the rather oblique question, “Who do others say that I am?”, Christ asked the disciples, “Who do you say that I am”?

A recent Barna Group research study revealed that less than 9% of all adult Americans have a “biblical worldview”*. In addition, only 19% of “Born again Christians”** have a biblical worldview. Interestingly, these percentages have remained unchanged for almost 15 years.

Among young adults (the “Mosaic” generation, ages 18 to 23), the percentage of people with a biblical worldview is less than one-half of one percent, as compared to near 1 out of every nine older adults***.

What do numbers like these mean to Christians, to our nation, and to parents and youth? Click through to read more…

To get a picture of what this number means, let’s imagine you – the dedicated reader – as a community college instructor at a large college and that you teach five classes a day of a common elective. At 08:00, two hundred students file in to your room and ‘learn’ for 50 minutes. A front row of young eyes fifteen people across, and thirteen or 14 rows deep. At 09:00 this repeats, then 10:00, 11:00 and 13:00. One thousand young adults throughout each weekday, watching you and listening; taking what you say and processing it.

How many of those students entered that room and listened to what you taught through the filter of a biblical worldview? Five or less. One in every class. In that sea of faces, only ONE young person looked at their instructor and filtered every word and concept through a filter of ancient God-given wisdom that was intended for our betterment. And we wonder! We wonder why youth seems ‘lost’ and afraid, always compensating for something unseen. We wonder why suicide rates are up, why school shootings happen, and why there is so much personal pain in the world as a result of poor choices.

Every time I speak about numbers like these, well-meaning (and perhaps defensive) parents say, “Oh yes, but it’s common while youth are ‘finding themselves’ to question their faith. They will ‘come back’ and believe”. They then quote Proverbs 22:6, secure in the knowledge that the child “will return when he or she is older”. Two points there, first, we already know – from this same study – that only one of nine adults ‘come back’, and my second is related, and that is, “Come back to what”? Other Barna studies have also pointed out that a persons worldview is primarily shaped and is firmly in place by the time someone reaches the age of 13; it is refined through experience during the teen and early adult years; and then it is passed on to others during their adult life. Such studies underscore the necessity of parents and other influencers being intentional in how they help develop the worldview of children.

Worldview has a dramatic influence on a persons choices in any given situation. Research indicates that there are unusually large differences in behavior related to matters such as media use, profanity, gambling, alcohol use, honesty, civility, and sexual choices where one worldview vs. another is concerned.

Barna put it best when he said, “There are several troubling patterns to take notice of. First, although most Americans consider themselves to be Christian and say they know the content of the Bible, less than one out of ten Americans demonstrate such knowledge through their actions. Second, the generational pattern suggests that parents are not focused on guiding their children to have a biblical worldview. One of the challenges for parents, though, is that you cannot give what you do not have, and most parents do not possess such a perspective on life. That raises a third challenge, which relates to the job that Christian churches, schools and parachurch ministries are doing in Christian education. Finally, even though a central element of being a Christian is to embrace basic biblical principles and incorporate them into one’s worldview, there has been no change in the percentage of adults or even born again adults in the past 13 years regarding the possession of a biblical worldview”.

Are you learning every day? Do you pass on what you learn? Do you LIVE what you learn so those around you can be affected by it? Are you part of a church that helps you mature in correct biblical learning (orthodoxy) and then mentors you and holds you accountable while you live it (orthopraxy)? You cannot give what you do not have, and there are a majority of people in our country who THIRST for more, and can be given nothing, because most of us have nothing to give.

I challenge you today; hit your knees, ask the Lord to fill your cup, and then pour it out on others. Rinse and Repeat.

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DEFINITIONS

*For the purposes of this survey, a “biblical worldview” was defined as believing that absolute moral truth exists; the Bible is totally accurate in all of the principles it teaches; Satan is considered to be a real being or force, not merely symbolic; a person cannot earn their way into Heaven by trying to be good or do good works; Jesus Christ lived a sinless life on earth; and God is the all-knowing, all-powerful creator of the world who still rules the universe today. In the research, anyone who held all of those beliefs was said to have a biblical worldview.

**For the purposes of this survey, these are people who said they have made a personal commitment to Jesus Christ that is important in their life today and that they are certain that they will go to Heaven after they die only because they confessed their sins and accepted Christ as their savior.

***The other group that possessed a below average likelihood of holding a biblical worldview were those people that describe themselves as liberal on social and political matters (also less than one-half of one percent).

Technorati Tags: christ, christian worldview, disciple, Faith, young adult, youth

This message isn’t about whether or not you hide and search for eggs, or enjoy sweet treats on this holiday. Frankly, hiding things, searching for things, finding things, and tasting something sweet are all enjoyable things to do. My question is, “What are we focused on as we perform our activities on a daily basis, not only at Easter, but year round”?

Are you hiding something? From others, from God? What in our lives should we be bringing into the Light of Day, to be given to God and forsaken and forgiven? What should we be freed from that has a hold on us?

Are you searching for something that you haven’t yet found? Perhaps you attend a church, but you don’t yet feel like a member of the body of Christ? Perhaps you have walked with the Lord for many years, but you are struggling right now under the weight of this world and its attacks? Perhaps you are looking for a friend or companion to help and encourage you.

Have you found what you are looking for? Do you know that you have it, and that it will never leave? Are you assured that you have it, secure in that knowledge, and growing every day into His image?

If you are secure, walking in the Lord, growing with Him every day… are you taking JOY in the journey? Is there a song in your heart and on your lips? Can others not help but see the joy of the Lord shining through your eyes and in your life?

Too many times we are overtaken by the “here and now”, the temporal; but the power that raised Christ from the grave is ours, and it guarantees those that are saved that they will be with the Lord forever. Think about that for a moment: the power that raised Christ from the dead.. is yours. I don’t just mean the power to resist eating that extra Cadbury egg (trademarked), the power to avoid saying that short word to your spouse, or the power to deal with a child that is emotional at the moment, or even the power to overcome every sin on this earth; I mean, the awesome, heavenly power that brought our Lord back from the dead. (Romans 8:11, 1 Peter 1:3-7, Ephesians 1:17-21)

Technorati Tags: bunny, easter, he is risen, open tomb

Praying Hands

I helped a pastor and his family move this weekend, and though I was personally very sad to see them go, I was happy to help them take the next step in the Lord’s plan for their lives. This post is a personal prayer for blessings on them as the serve the Lord and the people around them. I wasn’t able to say this prayer with them before leaving, but I leave it here in the hopes that it will strengthen the family and friends that read it.

Father, we praise You for the safe journey and for the fact that we have arrived safe and sound here in Michigan. We thank You for Your grace and Your guidance, and we thank You for pouring out Your Spirit on this family. We know that we are men and women of unclean lips and hearts that are not always focused on You, and we give ourselves over to You again today to abide in us and to cleanse us, enabling us to live in Your image. Lord, today we hold up the Troutman family to You for blessing. Here is a family that has dedicated themselves to You and your work, and we ask blessings on that work in Your church.

In Pastor Rob, Lord, we have a man who has dedicated his life on this planet to protecting and helping others. This Christian lion-hearted man has approached life here – in Your Spirit – with gusto and integrity. As Rob transitions from being a sheepdog for the sheep into being a shepherd of Your sheep, Lord, please pour out yet another special helping of Your Spirit, enabling him to walk among your church as an effective pastor. Give Rob the wisdom to bridle his strength as he boldly proclaims your word and approaches issues in Your church. Continue to pour Your Spirit into Rob’s heart, fueling his passion for helping others and for serving Your flock. Father, please bless Pastor Rob in a special way for Your service.

In Kenna, Lord, we have a princess and a lady. A Princess because she is the daughter of a King, and a lady of the land because she is married to a Knight in Your order. Help her to always carry herself as such, giving gentle strength and structure to Pastor Rob and to Your flock here in Saginaw. Continue to bless her with the ability to pass on a knowledge of You and Your Word to her children, help her to raise them up directly in the path of Your Light, and enable her to live as a Proverbs 31 woman, a shining and honorable example to Your church. Father, please bless Kenna as she walks with and helps Rob in Your service.

For Ryker, Lord, we ask that You accompany Him on his march into manhood. We know that he could have no better example than his earthly father here, save His heavenly father. Give him the wisdom to take direction from his lion-hearted father, and in those times when he cannot, help him to look to the lion of Judah for his help and sustenance. Father, please bless Ryker as he becomes a man in a difficult world.

For Kenton, Lord, we ask that you accompany her in a special and gentle way as she takes her first steps into womanhood. She has a shining example in her mother Lord, but we know that this is not always enough. Help Kenton to turn to you when this world seems too harsh and unforgiving, help her to level her mood and cheer herself with Your Spirit. Father, please bless Kenton as she grows into a strong Christian woman.

For the two little ones Lord (Kylee and Keris) (sp?), they are the luckiest little kids on this earth. They are cute (4 and 5 you know), they live in a Christian home with parents of integrity, and they have two loving and responsible older siblings. Even with this amazing start Lord, we know that we all need You, and we pray that these two precious children remember their lessons of You, Your mighty works, Your power, and Your personal interest in each of our hearts. Father, we ask blessings on these two little girls as they grow.

Lord, please bless the congregations that Pastor Rob and his family left, and the one they are coming into. Strengthen these local limbs of Your body, and bless them in proportion to their willingness to walk in Your way. We pray all these things in the name of Your Son, Amen.

D-Day

My father was born in 1933 just after the giddy height of the 1920′s had worn off and the Great Depression had gripped the United States. By the time of my Dad’s birth, the world economy was in turmoil and 1300 banks in the U.S. had closed. An additional four and one half million people lost their jobs, in a population of 125 million and now more than 30 million Americans had no income. Herbert Hoover had seemed unable to act, and Congress passed the Smoot-Hawley Tariff Act, exacerbating an already established global recession. In 1932 F.D.R. arrived with massive bailout plans designed to shore up the economy, and the effect of some of these plans are felt yet today. Overseas, three men were planning to change the face of the political landscape, Hitler in Germany, Stalin in Russia, and Mao Zedong in China.

In the later 1930′s, Chamberlain returned from a summit with Hitler and proclaimed, “..we have peace in our time, peace with honor”; it was neither. As country after country fell in front of the Nazi war machine, America watched and readied herself, sending aid to a Britain struggling against the German aggressor. When my father was eight years of age, the Japanese hit us at Pearl Harbor, dragging a now awakened bear from its den. America was at war.

By 1944, 12 million Americans were in uniform and 19 million more people were back at work, 35 percent of them were women. This nation was immersed in the war, from the front to the back, and they won. This generation knew the intense humility and privation that the Great Depression brought, they lived through the hard work of rebuilding this nation, they saw so many of their friends, so many aspiring scientists, musicians, mathematicians, farmers, that didn’t make it past their very early twenties, who gave their all to this country. Millions of men and women were involved in this fight through poverty and riches, adversity and achievement, and from defeat to triumph. This generation of men and women kept our way of life alive for their children through personal sacrifice. Thank you Mom and Dad, thank you Grandma and Grandpa, and I would like to apologize to you for not learning what I should have so that I could be this strong in my generation. (As an aside, I’d like to apologize to my kids as well, because we are doing the opposite of what our parents did; we are tearing this country down to feed our gluttony and leaving you scraps to rebuild with).

Here’s my question: Where are these men and women today? We are faced with what could be the beginnings of a depression, there are many questions where international violence is concerned, and many domestic programs are in jeopardy. I fear that our parents fought for this country and we inherited it, said, “thank you very much”, and went and sat on the couch.. and stayed there. We took their long-suffering and turned it into a need for immediate gratification, accepted their endurance and twisted it into expectation, and received the benefit of their toil and eroded it until we became apathetic.

I’d like to suggest that there is a Biblical parallel – several actually – to this tale of American success and failure. Let me first state that I will spend little time on the first – and most obvious – parallel which is the story of the Israelites in Judges. Their cycle of faith, backsliding, apostasy, supplication, deliverance, faith.. and so on was due to the fact that they took their eyes off the Lord. While I think this parallel is definitely appropriate here, I don’t want to make it the central issue because if I do, Christian men and women will blame others, and men and women of other faiths will set my suggestions aside as “Christian” and therefore irrelevant. I want all of us to go take a long look in the mirror.

⁵ Now this is what the Lord Almighty says: “Give careful thought to your ways. ⁶ You have planted much, but have harvested little. You eat, but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it.” - Haggai 1:5,6

Those who know the backstory for the book of Haggai understand that this warning is much like the first point I promised to spend little time on, but these verses alone are prophetic for us today. Don’t the people Haggai is referring to here sound a lot like modern-day Americans? I’d like to suggest that a major part of our failure to be ‘as great’ as our parents generation is because we are focused so much on ourselves that we have no time to believe that we are part of something greater than ourselves. We want things and time, and we want them for ‘us and ours’ and not for others. This selfishness is one reason there has been a huge backlash in this country against people who desire wealth, and in an unhealthy way. We aren’t holding up people who give to others and keep country traditions alive, instead we reward those who decide not to work with the money we’ve stolen from those who do labor. We reward selfishness and punish labor, and we wonder why we have a country chock full of people unmotivated to work!?

Third, in Judges we see that the beginning of the cycle of backsliding begins with an association with evil, with the people around the Israelites, with intermarriage and taking on their customs. It is difficult to live next to a thing and remain insulated from it; it is impossible to remain unaffected if you marry into it. We are called to be, “..in the world, but not of the world”, and we are called to witness to all nations, and we are to remain set apart. Christians often take these commands too far; on one end of the spectrum we have Christians that pray that ‘unbelievers’ won’t move into the vacant house next door and try to keep their family from associating with the ‘unsaved’; on the other end, we have people prone to certain weaknesses going right back into their old lives to ‘witness’ to others they once knew. It is clear that we must come into contact with ‘the world’ to witness, Christ did this and did it regularly, but if He needed rest and regeneration with like-minded people, who are we to think we don’t? This is where a local church becomes so critical. We are to bear one another’s burdens and to build each other up in the faith.. so that we can do the Lord’s work.

So, why is this generation ill-prepared to take on the challenges that faced our parents and grandparents? Because God is no longer the center of our lives, because we are almost wholly selfish, and because we are so caught up with what others are doing that we have failed to chart a course for ourselves (let alone follow it).

What can we do? I suggest that we turn back to the Word. If you are not a Christian today, first, I thank you for reading this far, and second, I urge you to crack open a Bible and read the book of John. It is about 3/4 of the way through the Bible, in the New Testament. Just read the book over the next few days or weeks and see what you think. Email me at windowormirror@gmail.com to chat. For those who believe, I suggest taking inventory. Find out where your focus is. Is it on the eternal? Do you have a heart for Kingdom building here on earth? Let us all become less selfish and carry out the work of the Lord here on earth. With a renewed focus, God can use us in great ways.. we have at our disposal – for His purposes – the power that raised Christ from the dead!

Technorati Tags: father, greatest generation, history, honor, man, men, respect, strength, war

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Let me say that I am more comfortable writing than speaking, but that the puppet show we just saw gives me an idea.. I can hide behind something and speak… solving the stagefright issue; I think they have it right!

Before I get into my little ‘talk’ here, I’d like to introduce my wife, Justina. There are two ways you can get to know Justina; just ‘be there’ after any event she’s in to chat with her, or read Proverbs 31. Either one will give the same picture and result.

So, how did a big, anti-social, biker-looking guy get involved with bioethics and the Sanctity of Human Life? My parents did not have children the old-fashioned way, and decided instead to adopt. I don’t know much about my birth mother, except that she gave me the gift of life, and that she also prepared me for eternal life by requesting that I be given to a Christian family. She gave me up at birth, and – after I had a two-week bout with jaundice – my parents picked me up from Children’s Hospital in San Francisco, CA in <mumble mumble>. They had the next baby boy put into the adoption system; two others were added the day I was born. We were one redhead, one blond, and one brunette. My parents, being blessed with the gift of discernment and having deep wisdom, picked the cutest; the redhead, yours truly. The joke was on them, when I was 8 months old, all my red hair fell out and I was bald. It grew back in blond, and as you can see, history does – indeed – repeat itself. I don’t expect it will come back this time; red, blond, brown or otherwise. Being adopted was the first step on my way to being an advocate for the unborn. Fast-forward a few decades and I attended a banquet for Hope here in town, and God’s time was ripe.. I signed on with Hope as a Board Member. I know that you’ve just heard an overview of Hope and its services, but suffice it to say that I believe that the staff and volunteers at Hope are devoted and faithful servants on a difficult battlefield. My hat is off to each of them.

[prayer], Father, help my words to be true and if in my human weakness I stumble and they are not, help them to fall on wise ears. Send each of the people in this room who submit to your will out into the world to hold up a banner that says, “every life matters, because each life is yours Lord”. In the name of Your Son, amen.[/prayer]

I’d like to talk about a hundred different things today, but because I respect you all more than that, I’d like to – instead – give an overview of the term “pro-life”, a construct for us to use as we think about this ideal we support and how to interact with others about our belief.

What does it mean to be “pro-life”? Do you have to be a Christian to be pro-life? There are some secular humanists that claim to be pro-life, so our ranks are broader than “Christians”. Sadly, there are also Christians that are not pro-life, so being a Christian is not a litmus test for a pro-life ideal. If we look at the pro-life movement through human eyes, we see a landscape that is confusing and complex. The issues don’t seem to have clear edges and much confusion exists around the fuzzy lines between ‘good’ and ‘bad’. We hear questions like:

·      Isn’t it better not to come into the world at all than come into it as an unwanted child? There are children that are born into drug addiction in the womb, and they go through terrible pain through withdrawal. Other children are born into terrible circumstances with parents that are unprepared. It is clear however that humans desire to live on, even if their circumstances are poor or lowly. We fight to survive. It is clear that living is preferable to almost all people than dying.

·      When does “life” begin? Can you prove that? Many theories abound about when ‘life’ begins. Some assert that it begins even before conception. Others say conception, more every day assert that implantation is the time ‘life’ begins. Some say that the date of viability or the time of birth is ‘obviously’ the time ‘life’ begins. Most with an answer agree that this is the place a slippery slope exists, but they still have an opinion.

·      On the topic of viability: What does ‘viable’ mean? Able to take in nourishment and process oxygen into carbon dioxide? Able to survive on their own? If this is the measure, there are 29 year-old men in Momma’s basement, playing an Xbox, that are not yet ‘alive’.

·      We admit that human life is more valuable than other forms of life, but human life cannot be there until the neocortex is fully formed (at 13 weeks). It is true that the neocortex is not fully formed until this date, that this structure only exists in mammals, and that the human neocortex is the most complex of all animals… this is a difficult argument to counter.. even if the timing seems a bit arbitrary. We’ll come back to that.

·      Even if we say that ‘life’ begins early on, it only matters when ‘personhood’ happens. Even if a thing is ‘alive’, it isn’t ‘important’ until it is a person. This cannot be early in the process. Again, this is an incredibly difficult timing to figure out, isn’t it? When does a fetus become a ‘person’? Is that timing the same with babies that all develop at slightly different rates?

·      We agree that both the baby and the mother are humans, but the mother’s right over her body is the overruling right. Her right ‘wins’. This idea is – frighteningly – widely held, even though a Founding Document of our country states that we are “created equal”, implying that our rights are equal.

·      When should life end? This is another – currently popular – topic in bioethics. There is a group – called Extropians – that believe that death should be conquered and that we should live a very long time, perhaps forever. They seek to do this through advances in science and medical technology.

In these short few questions, can you see how difficult the waters are through which we chart our course? If only there were a map, a beacon that would cut through the night and show us our way. A book perhaps, that holds the answer to how we are to view our world and how we should act. Folks, I suggest that this is that book [raise the Bible].

Folks, our society today is in trouble. Economic decay is beginning to hit home for us, even here in Wausau, WI with layoffs and company shutdowns. More important to solve than our economic blight, however, is our moral decay. More and more stories hit our front page every day that indicate we have lost our moral compass. Ex-husbands knifing ex-wives to death, a man gunning down an ex-girlfriend in a parking lot at work. How did we slide from the overt and purposeful protection of women through apathy into an active attack on women in so short a time?

The answer of course is sin and turning our face from God. God created us ‘tselem ‘elohiym, in the image of God. Satan hates God and wants to kill him. Since he cannot, he kills those made in His image, His children, and when he can, he targets the innocent, the helpless, the unborn.

If we replace our complex and rationalized worldviews with the word of the Lord, the points above become incredibly clear.

·      The first issue we covered… Isn’t it better not to come into the world at all than come into it as an unwanted child? Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? And not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. (Matt 10:29) Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you (Jer 1:5)  God wants each of His children and nothing happens here on this earth that He does not see. 

·      When does “life” begin? Ephraim’s glory • shall fly away like a bird— no birth, • no pregnancy, • no conception! (Hos 9:11) Behold, • you are barren and have not borne children, but you shall conceive and bear a son. (Judges 13:3) By faith Sarah • herself received power to conceive, (Hebrews 11:11). In these verses we see conception, pregnancy, and conception all tied together, equal in the eyes of the Lord, as the creation of ‘life’.

 ·      On the topic of viability: Back to Jeremiah 1:5. It seems that God knew us – and therefore valued us – well before conception. In His eyes, we already exist (did exist). We are ‘viable’ from the perspective of the One that does not change.

·      We admit that human life is more valuable than other forms of life, but .. In Scripture we see – clearly called out – that human life is set apart from other life. Adam was created differently and he was given dominion over the rest of life.  As far as the neocortical argument goes, the neocortex of any given baby already exists in God’s mind, and therefore that life is sacred to us.

·      Even if we say that ‘life’ begins early on, it only matters when ‘personhood’ happens. Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you (Jer 1:5). For someone else to ‘know’ you, you must be knowable, you must be a person.

·      We agree that both the baby and the mother are humans, but the mother’s right over her body is the overruling right. Her right ‘wins’. 

In Romans 9:21 Paul explains that we are the clay and that God is the potter. Does not the potter have rights over the clay? The Creator over the created? With a Christian worldview our ‘rights’ mean nothing. We act to bring glory to God and to Him forever. God’s will overrides whatever ‘right’ we think we have.

·      When should life end? Well, I stand with the Extropians on this one, and you may be shocked to know that God does too. We all believe that life should be eternal; we just believe that this comes through a confession of faith in the God become Man who died for us.

So, to truly understand the depth of value that life has, we must understand life from God’s perspective. He knew us before we were conceived, He has a plan for each of us, and He desires that we be with Him forever.

 So, do we then ignore our short and difficult time on this earth and focus only on the eternal? Retreat into the mountains as an ascetic? In John 10:10 we hear Christ’s words as He says, “I have come so that they may have life, and have it abundantly”.  Christ intends for us to have an abundant life as a believer. This doesn’t mean worldly riches; in fact, John goes on to describe the life of a shepherd, giving up his life for his sheep and explaining that His sacrifice would mean eternal life for His disciples. An abundant life is an eternal life.

I consider it a victory to be involved in the process of helping a mother decide to keep a baby’s heart beating for nine months of pregnancy until it is born, but I consider it an honor of the highest regard to share the gospel with the mother and father of that baby in the hopes that they will share with me in the ‘abundant life’, the life that is eternal.

Finally, as I close, I want to talk about what it means to be a Christian; a winsome Christian with a heart of service. People with other perspectives on this issue accuse us of having hatred for the mother, of wishing to ‘punish’ her. They say that we are very interested in a baby until it is born, and then could care less about its circumstances. Are they right? How then do we prove them wrong? Public prayer is one way, the chain for life is a wonderful visible reminder to people, apologetics and debate are another way, but Christ told us that others would know who we were – and by corollary what we stood for – “by our love”. St. Francis of Assisi said, “Wherever you go, preach Christ; and if necessary, use words”. By our gentle, deep, and accepting love for those involved in a situation where the sanctity of human life is concerned, we will affect people for eternal life.

Thank you for giving me your attention this afternoon, and may God go with each of you as you carry His message of life to others.

Fireproof

Not often does a movie come along that I enjoy. Rarer still, a movie that I respect. Still harder to find, a movie that I enjoy, respect, and that I am emotionally caught up in and learn something from. Fireproof is one of these rare movies. In fact, it may stand alone in its own category.

This movie tells a story about a man – Caleb Holt – whose marriage is now coming on hard times. It’s coming onto hard times because neither he nor his wife have learned how to love unselfishly. Their reaction is to end the marriage, rather than fight for it. The main character’s father steps in and asks his son to go on a 40-day “love dare” journey, treating his wife the way a wife should be treated, regardless her ‘worthiness’ to accept that love and care. The journey takes some tough twists and turns, and the results are – to him – unexpected and will change his life forever.

This film is unapologetically Christian. It states that to give love, you must first understand love, and you must have it. This true love can only come from Christ and it is only this love that lasts forever, is wholly unselfish, and the only love strong enough to hold even when the other person is ‘undeserving’. There are so many layers to this film it is difficult to discuss them all, but male pornography issues, older male and female mentoring, Christian friends, influence of parents in the life, Christian witness, and counseling are all touched on and dealt with in reasonable and approachable terms.

Why did I enjoy this movie so much? Well, because I am Caleb Holt. I don’t mean that I am a firefighter and that the movie was modeled after my life, I mean that I acted as Caleb acted, and my life came to the same crossroads as his did. In fact, I acted far worse than Caleb did, for a longer period of time, was far more addicted to pornography, and this with three children in the house. My crossroad was an offramp on a freeway, not a fork in the road.

After a 2-hour struggle on my knees with the Lord (which I lost and He won), I came out of that dark place and began to treat my wife with the love that I am called to show, even though she had nothing to return. I did this after she left the house with the children, and in God’s grace, He loved her back into our marriage. I didn’t have a 40-day plan, but I knew that my approach to life had been – to this point – completely unsuccessful. I had things, and money, but nothing that mattered, and I wasn’t walking with my Lord. I decided that, even if He did not return my family to me, that I would walk with Him because I was inqdequate on my own. I would – finally – become part of the solution, and not the problem. I would help build God’s kingdom here on earth.

I don’t know where each of you are in your marriages, but I can guarantee that there are pieces of Caleb and Catherine in each of us. For the married, I urge you to watch this movie with your spouse. For single men, I urge you to watch this movie and see the positive effect that Christian friends can have on a man, and the devastating effects of pornography on a woman’s heart. Single women, watch this movie and learn not to gossip, or to exacerbate your friends marriage difficulties with a sharp tongue.

If your marriage has had struggles and you watch this movie with your spouse, watch the matinee and set aside the entire evening for healing and talking. This movie is one of the very few that can change your life if you let it. If you are willing to go ‘all the way’ and let the Lord into your heart as well, this movie won’t just change your life, it will be responsible for leading you to the One that saved it.

Technorati Tags: christ, love, marriage, movie, romance, Wife

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Here are the four major reasons I believe that we have school shootings:

1. No consequences
We have created a society in the United States that allows a ridiculous amount of irresponsible action before any consequences are felt, and even then they are reduced to a mere fraction of what ‘life’ would do to someone naturally. When you are raised in an environment where no correction is given regularly – in little ways – you don’t learn what you “should” and “should not” do. Our capability for deviance from reasonable action becomes larger as we get older and without this regular course correction, a child can end up with sloppy impulse control and a failure to mature.

2. No respect for life
We tell our kids that they evolved from a puddle of goo and that they are animals like any other. We tell them that nothing makes humans special save their ability to reason and that simple evolutionary processes over millions of years resulted in our intelligence and ability to seem like we have this thing some silly religious types call a “soul”. We call it “sentience” so that we can devalue it’s real import. We kill our children in the womb with regularity and tell each other this is somehow “more caring” than raising it. Our personal wants and desires are more important than a life. With this we prove that life is accidental, a mere happenstance of chance and that it is not precious; it is not something to revere or protect.

3. No right and wrong
Since religious people are a bunch of whackjobs that need something outside themselves (when there really IS nothing), we tell our kids that every belief in any “god” is the same crutch as every other and that anything you “choose to believe” is right. Morals change as society changes and the majority of people’s actions select what is “right”. “Right” is only a definition and it changes with the ebb and flow of human choice. Since there is no truth, and no “right”, the corollary is quickly figured by the child and nothing is viewed as “wrong”.

4. No Love
Many children today are raised by parents that have bought into points 1-3 above and that add a great deal of selfishness to the mix. These children have no “time” with mom or dad and therefore do not feel “loved” in any real way. There is no-one that cares for them, and this feeling is hyper-injected with hormone fuel at puberty, pushing many teens into a black depression. This results in young adults that know the world is cold and does not care what happens to them.

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So, we have a child that feels that no one cares, that places no value on life, that thinks everything is “fine” to do, and that has never practiced denying themselves anything. Add to this mixture a pile of racing thoughts and hormones, and I cannot believe that there are not MORE shootings!

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So, faced with this dire situation, we ask, “What shall we do”? In short, we must reverse each point above. My personal opinion on how to do this appears below. Please understand that I know that both the problem and the solution are not four simple steps, but I do believe that these four things are fundamental to our success.

A. Parents should give their children consequences for incorrect action on a consistent and age-appropriate basis from a very young age. As a child matures, so do the consequences and as the child’s capacity to understand increases, so do the explanations of what these actions might bring in the world outside the home and why, “we don’t do that”. Society should then change to allow all citizens to feel the consequences of their own actions. If you don’t want to work, you don’t eat. If you want to live off of others and thieve to do that, you’ll end up working anyway; on a chain gang.

B. We should teach respect for life from a young age as well, by putting each other above ourselves and teaching that life is a gift from God, given to both the animals and man by God Himself. We should teach children that we are above the animals and are to care for them, but that God made us in His image and therefore we each have infinite significance as children of the King. Christ would have died for any ONE of us, and that makes our lives significant! We must then change society to reflect the view that life is important by protecting each other from those that would take life. This would come in the form of protecting life and limb and extending that basic right to children yet in the womb. We cannot tell children to put another before themselves and then put our convenience ahead of the lives of the unborn.

C. There is truth, and we should teach that to our children. Our God lives today and is active in our lives and on this earth. Children should be taught about faith, God, and how best to glorify Him; and then watch as their parents model that behavior. As Americans, we need to get over this misplaced and hyper-extended notion of a separation between church and state and begin to teach the truths that our forefathers recognized, that all rights come from God Himself and that He has given us the definition between “right” and “wrong”. Truth exists, and we should recognize it, teach it, and live it.

D. Does it not go without saying that if there is love that there will be less violence? We should love our children. I don’t mean that we should have “warm feelings” inside toward them, but we should LOVE, as a choice and as a verb. Place yourself aside as a parent and spend time with your children. Work alongside them, talk to them, listen to them, and give them a home in which they can emote and still be safe and protected. Teach them then to love as they have been loved. Explain to them what love is and means, don’t assume they “just know”. Explain what it takes to make interpersonal relationships work. Ensure that they understand that they can control only themselves and that they should love without expecting emotion in return. Tell them how they can do this because God does this with each of us, and as children of the King, we can do this for each other.

Will these things stop school shootings? Perhaps not entirely, but children that have been raised as I describe in an America as I describe will very likely be innoculated against that type of behavior from a young age.

Technorati Tags: children, ethics, gun, morals, parenting, school shootings, teaching

4% of men ages 16-24 in America attend church regularly.

Since the Industrial Revolution, the involvement of men in the church has declined in a cyclical pattern, but with a steady pace. What will a church with no men look like? The world gives us some answer today, in that more and more children are being raised without a father in their lives. Did you know that over 28% of children in America today are being raised without a father in the home? Did you know that in the African-American community that this number jumps to 63% ? The impact of this is recognized in our sinful world, but we’ve refused to see the implications for our church. A son who is absent a father between the ages of 14 and 22 has his risk of incarceration increase 5% for every year he lives without a father. Children who live in a home without a father are 32% more likely to smoke, drink, or use illegal drugs than children in a two-parent home. Girls raised without a father present have sex for the first time an average of 1.6 years earlier than girls raised with a father present. It is clear, even in secular society, that father-presence is critical. What about our church?
Statistics show that if a child is brought to church regularly throughout his childhood by its mother, and the father does not attend, that the likelihood of that child attending church regularly as an adult is around 2%. If the father takes the children to church, that percentage jumps to 33%.

Folks, God has given men the call to spiritually lead their families. I don’t pretend to know why spirituality has been designed to be passed on by men, but I read Scripture that says that it has and the numbers bear it out in practice. I also see that men are leading at an ever declining rate and that leadership cannot be based only on speech, but on practice. Brennan Manning says, “The greatest cause of atheism in the world today is Christians who claim Christ with their lips, and then walk out the door and deny Him with their lifestyle”.  Learning is a wonderful thing, but I am already educated well beyond my obedience. We must do what God reveals to us in His word as we read and pray; learning it isn’t enough.

Deut 6:4-9 gives a wonderful overview of what it takes to pass on spiritual concepts and a more complete picture of our Savior to your family. Jewish culture at that time had a son learning a trade from his father and women working together in the home all day, every day. That kind of dedicated time made for an environment where a father’s actions were seen and mimicked on a more regular basis than today. Now a child only sees Dad when he gets home from work, grumpy and snapping at Mom, and that’s what they emulate. Let it not be so in our homes. Men, we must model a good relationship for our children. The way you treat your wife is the way that your son will treat his wife, and the way that your daughters will accept treatment from a man. Do you realize how powerful that is? I know you might be the “big dog” at work, and have the ability to change some things there, but in your daily example to your children, you have the power to change the world.

I just returned from a men’s conference in Elmbrook, WI called “No Regrets”, A Life of Significance. This conference had 5,000 men gathering to fellowship, learn, and share about the Christian life as a man. What does a life of “No Regrets” look like? In 1 Cor 3:11-15 we read about a man building a life on the foundation of Jesus Christ, and that the Day will bring his work to light. In verse 15 we read about a life of regrets, “..he will be saved, but only as a man escaping through the flames”. A life of No Regrets ends with the words, “Well done thou good and faithful servant, enter now into the glory of thy Maker”. A life of significance is a life spent on service, focused on bringing others closer to Him and preparing for heaven. A life of significance recognizes this existence as a blink between eternities and gives it that same weight in our minds. A man that is living a life of significance can be recognized, because he is doing something about it.

Men, we have been given hands to work, feet to move, and our behinds are there to hold our legs on; not to sit with. Get off your blessed assurance, rise today and lead your family in Christ, affect your place of work for Christ,  and train yourself into the heart of God through prayer and reading the Word. In 2028 my son will be 31, and if we as Christian men commit to living lives of significance, we will still be in a vibrant and healthy church, full of men living lives of example in the power of the Lord.

“Wherever you go, preach Christ; and if necessary, use words” – Francis of Assisi

Technorati Tags: husband, men, spiritual leadership

“Family”.. interesting word, yes? A group of people brought together by necessity and design, but not chosen by each person. That is, we choose our friends, but not our family; yet, the bonds we have with family run deeper than many others. Even if we don’t have a close relationship with family, the hurt that we feel from that is deeper than most other hurts.

What does the word “family” mean when we say, “family of believers”? Again, we don’t choose who is in or out of that family. If we are in it, we don’t agree with everyone else in it, and we don’t have to (on everything); but we DO have to love each other! in Luke 6:32 Christ says, “If you love those who love you, whoopity stinking do” (RPV: Ron’s Paraphrased Version). We all like to hang around with certain people more than others, and that’s no big deal, but we need to extend ourselves, push ourselves to connect with people that we normally wouldn’t… that’s where Christ can be glorified! Sure, go to church and hang with your holies, but reach out as well. Talk to your family members! Newsflash: There’s family members lookin’ at you thinkin’, “Oh man, I guess I should push past my comfort zone and greet that guy with a holy handshake”.

If you don’t like the fact that certain people are in the family of Christ, get over it. You aren’t the Dad, and thank God for that! God Himself chooses who will be in His family, and we are called to love each of them and show them the grace that Christ showed us when He died on that cross to bring us into His family. Please be humbled by your adoption, rather than judging others’ acceptance into our family. Judging their acceptance is judging the soveriegnty of our God and His wisdom, and trust me, that’s not a place we want to be. Unity in Spirit, unity in love, not agreement on every little thing.

Have a faith-filled 2008!

Ron

I pondered our family and the real meaning of Christmas, and I reflected on the last year. We’ve pulled together as a family quite well, and we scaled back Christmas this year. We gave a lot of clothing gifts and other practical things (like favorite snacks and so on). One thing that stands out is that we visited with some friends of ours last month who had sold all of their possessions in order to take a ministry opportunity far away, and then God showed them that this opportunity was not for them. Their kids were going to have a Christmas without gifts, and while Christmas isn’t solely about gifts, young children find it hard to understand why they have nothing under the tree. My wife took the mother of this family to her present closet and split our children’s presents down the middle, giving half to the other family. Our children supported this, even without knowing what was in each package. We also were able to give many new and hand-me-down clothes to the family to help them in the short-term.

So what’s my point? Christmas isn’t about getting… it isn’t even really about giving. Christmas is a time when we give gifts to commemorate the greatest gift of all. God gave His Son.. His only Son, that we might have a path to Him through that gift. God cared about us enough to provide a sacrifice that would get us back to Him, even though it cost Him everything. Our God cared about us enough that He would allow His own Son to be killed to cover our sins so that we would someday see Him face-to-face. Even when we give “big” gifts, we cannot come close to the sacrifice that God has made for us.

Won’t you take time to thank God for His Christmas gift to us right now?

First, when someone comes to me with a problem in their life, I always ask them to stop looking out the window for the problem, and first look into the mirror for the problem. We can only change ourselves, and there are plenty of issues right there to deal with. I looked into the mirror and saw a man that was willing to pick the speck out of another’s eye, while ignoring the 2×4 in his own. I saw a man who – like the rest of society – was dazzled by bright and shiny things put forth by the media that are – almost assuredly – designed to make us stop looking in the mirror at our own issues. Why is reality TV and “bad news” so interesting? Because it fools us into thinking, “I am not like that person, so I am ok”. This is the very attitude that Christ condemned when speaking about the Pharisees. It was time to examine myself and why I had strong opinions on someone else’s sin.

Second, we have all sinned and fallen short of the glory of God. It is just fate that has us toiling away in relative obscurity – with all the sins of Jamie Lynn and more – quietly and behind the scenes, with no cameras to capture our every fault. I guarantee you, if I had a camera watching me during every moment from the age of 8 or 9 on, I couldn’t show my face in public now! Isn’t it wonderful that we can hide our sin while we snipe at another’s? Makes you feel great that you don’t have “that” sin, doesn’t it? Or maybe you do/did, but you pick at Lynn Spears (their mother) for poor parenting, without knowing how – ultimately – your own children will turn out? We have all the sins others have, and frankly, if you really really hate Jamie Lynn, you must not be too far from her, because it takes similarity to breed proper hate. You cannot hate something you don’t personally understand.

Finally, I ask all of us, “Where is the man”!? Where is the 19 year-old male who has been having sex with a 16 year-old and committing (at least) a misdemeanor while doing so? Where is the father who was to teach Jamie what a good man looks like and how to demand more out of a man than a house and sexual activity? Am I raising my daughters in such a way that they will select a good man – from the precious few that there are – and will have an “order” to courting, marriage, child-creating, and child-raising? Am I raising my son to be a man that will cast aside his need for quick sexual release – as strong as that need can be – for his beloved as they court and marry? Am I raising my son to resist the sin of apathy and inaction; Adam’s sin in the garden? Am I fostering in him the desire and instinct to protect, rather than take advantage of; and to love unselfishly, rather than take what he can get?

To all of you who took up stones to cast at J.L.S., please drop them and go home. There’s nothing to see here; nothing that is, that you cannot already see in your ordinary home mirror. That is all..

While I was hunting and watching football over the last week, my dear wife’s project was to repaint and redecorate, our middle daughter’s room (which her mother, Laura, had stripped and repaired). She did that, with some help from our daughter, and the results are cute! But.. this wasn’t just a repainting job…

As my wife finished the painting and was cleaning up the room, she began to notice some smudges on the woodwork from the painting, and wiped those up. She then noticed that some of the furniture wasn’t clean, and wiped that down. She rearranged the room, put up pretty curtains, redid the closet, hung a closet rod, and put a dresser in the closet; but when she was “done” with the room, something still wasn’t right.

As my wife poked through some of the things in Liesel’s room, she noticed that there were dirty clothes here and there. She noticed that there were some toys and things of value in and among old papers, magazines, and candy wrappers.. things of value, but in with trash so that you couldn’t tell one thing from another. In fact, almost every drawer in the several dressers and containers had a mixture of clean clothes, dirty clothes, and trash! My wife carried three trash bags full out of that room when she was done cleaning, and I am not talking about the white tall ones.. I mean the Hefty large black ones. Now the room was completely tidy, with everything in its place.

Will the room stay this way? Not magically, but Liesel was SO grateful for a “new room” that she has vowed to keep it clean by working a bit each day and changing her habits so that she can keep her room as clean as it is right now; right after Mommy made it beautiful and new.

Readers, I’d like to suggest that Liesel’s Room is much like our heart when Christ comes in. Often, we are saved and things change quickly and dramatically, like the room being repainted; but there are still many hidden areas – areas that we aren’t even sure exist – that needs cleaning and only someone with experience can help us identify these and work them out with our Lord. This is why the community of believers is so important!

Once our hearts are clean, we must keep them that way, because if we don’t, more dirt and grime will rush in than before! (Luke 11:24-26) An accountability partner, daily prayer, and daily study are excellent ways to ensure that there is no room for the evil one to enter into our shiny new heart!

Finally, just as Liesel will have to spend a few minutes each morning polishing up her room, we must hit our knees and give our hearts over to the Lord – completely – every morning we awaken. Only in this way will they stay clean and shiny.

Several things struck me about the trip, and I’ll relate just a few here. First, when we found our seats, the fans around us were incredibly nice and everyone talked together, laughing and joking.. very good natured. By the 3rd quarter however, the mood had changed. Now there were braggarts, loud folks – men and women alike – that were throwing curse words around, yelling at the coaches, and generally misbehaving. This was with the Packers winning the game. So,what might make a person act this differently? The answer is simple; a lack of temperance and the ready presence of alcohol. The game is every bit as fun to watch with one beer in you as it is with five. The difference is, with one beer in you, the game might continue to be fun to watch for everyone around you!

The second thing I’ll comment on is a comment RJ made to me when we first arrived; “Dad, are you sure that’s the right field? That doesn’t look anywhere near as big as the one on TV”. Isn’t it that way with many things in our lives? We desire and pant after a thing that we think will make such a HUGE difference to us, and when we finally get it, we find that wanting was so much better a thing than having. We, rather, should stand with Paul who said that he was always comfortable because he had learned to be content in all circumstances (Phil 4:11).

Finally, the Packer began this game “shaky”. Brett Favre was not “on” with most of his early passes and it seemed almost like pure luck that we got a couple of first downs. Once a few series were behind the Pack however, their confidence increased and they established the run and began throwing the long ball. As the game continued in their favor, they picked apart the pass defense of the Vikings and ran the ball right over them in addition (first 100-yd game allowed by the Vikings all season). It’s the same in our spiritual lives. We cannot expect to “throw the long ball” until we have established a relationship and pattern of success in our Christian lives. We cannot expect to see results on one big prayer if we haven’t given God the opportunity to build our confidence and faith in Him by praying again and again about little things, and looking for the answers to those prayers.

As we look forward to the ride down with a couple of other guys, and begin to look forward at the matchup between the two teams, we see the parallels between the game and our spiritual walk…

Disclaimer: These parallels have little to do with the personalities and team affinity we each may have. Ignore those aspects please.

The Packers have a wily old veteran who has clearly lost a step in his speed and footwork, and those were slow to begin with. This veteran has a rocket arm however, and a couple of fair receivers. He has played more games, thrown more touchdowns, and had more victories and defeats than possibly anyone else on either side of the ball. The Packers have a strong run defense with an anchor defensive end and good linebackers.

The Vikings have a rookie running back that is full of talent. He has already broken a rushing yardage per game record and has incredible potential.The Vikings however, are even more one-dimensional than the Packers. While the Packers have run the ball a few times this season, no fantasy player would start the Vikings QB unless they were playing in a “point per handoff to the RB” league. The Vikings can only run the ball. Add to this the fact that the Vikings pass defense is porous and ranks near the bottom of the NFL.
This means that the Vikings will run their strength against the strength of the Packers, and that the Packers will be attacking the weakness of the Vikings. Which do you think the devil does? It is true that the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour; and this means he certainly can attack us in our human strength and win. It is also written, “resist the devil and he will flee”, which seems to indicate that we can stand and fight the devil in the strength of the Lord and be victorious, but I’d like to suggest that the devil most often works against us in those things that we are most vulnerable to. That is, Satan takes our natural weaknesses and uses those to manipulate us. He often uses these things to cause us to sin, but he can also use these things to make us feel unworthy and depressed, and in that state, we cannot take joy in and glorify our Lord, and that’s what Satan desires. You see, Satan wants God dead, and since he can’t do anything to God, he comes after his children, those created “in His image”. Satan wants to separate us from God, and it really doesn’t matter to him how he gets that done, as long as he gets it done.

I’d suggest that we take the high ground early. Study, pray, fast, journal, meditate, have an accountability partner; do all the things necessary to train for battle. Then, when confronted on a battleground not of your choosing, or in an area where you are particularly weak, don’t fight, RUN! Avoid fighting on ground where you are at a disadvantage. Put plans in place to avoid those battlegrounds. If you are an alcoholic, don’t go to parties where there will be alcohol. If you are prone to lust, don’t go to witness on a beach in south Florida.

If you don’t know what “spiritual discipline” is, or how to start; drop me a line and I’ll be happy to chat you through my basic knowledge of it or seek out your pastor or priest, and ask him about training, instead of trying.

Oh, and, GO PACK!

The husband in this example was controlling, petty, and dismissive and the rules of the home did not apply to him but were liberally applied to all others. I would suggest that this man is in all of us, and I would exhort men to stand up and be more than a male. Be what God designed you to be, for Him, for your wife, for your church, and for your children…

Men today don’t know a lot of things. They are not being raised with any sense of “manhood” (what it means to be a man). We try to make our little boys act like little girls, and when they don’t, we give them Ritalin and sit them in the front of the class and hold them in from recess. Worse than this, we don’t tell boys when “manhood” begins. There is no rite of passage, no understanding of, “From this day forth, you shall be considered a man”. Childhood used to last until age 18 (maximum), now – for many men – it lasts through a young man’s 20′s and into his 30′s. How many of you have spoken with women who’s sons still live in the basement at age 29, playing video games for a living? “Johnny’s still at home, but we’re praying for him”. He doesn’t need only prayer, he needs Dad to drag him outside and make him work!

How is it that we are not teaching our sons to be men? Well, I’d posit that there are two primary reasons for this. First, we don’t spend any time with them and second, we don’t know how to be men ourselves. It once was that a son would apprentice with his father (or another man) and would learn alongside them about the trade, and as a result, would also pick up critical things about what a man does all day, how he acts, and how he treats others. Today, we run off to work and our son goes to school. When our boy comes home he sits in front of the TV or a video game while we engage in our hobby without him or go work out at the gym. This teaches little Johnny how to live in Mom’s basement later on, not how to become a man! We don’t know how to be men because we’re the first generation raised wholly in a post-modern world. Even if you were raised by solid parents, the world has eaten at you, claiming its apathetic margin at every stage of your life, telling you that every belief is equal, and children should be allowed to run free and do as they like. You don’t know how to raise a man because your past didn’t make you into one!

What does your wife need? I don’t mean, “What’s your perception of what you needy wife whines about all the time”? I mean, what does the creature to whom you’ve pledged to have and to hold, to cherish… what does she NEED!? Do you hold her face in your hands, gently stroke her hair, talk with her gently about life, love, and your children? Or do you leer at her, rolling your eyes when she asks you to remove your shoes in the mud room, chuckle under your breath and find secret enjoyment when the kids misbehave to her? Do you sacrifice for her, picking up around the house, making her tea in the evening, helping make the bed in the morning, looking for what burdens you can remove from her or do you plop down in front of the TV when you get home and look for someone, anyone, to bring you a drink? When she wants to do a certain thing around the house, make an expenditure,etc. do you mock or control her? Or do you revel in the fact that you have a capable and brave wife that handles her household with grace and courage?

Men, our wives need us, but they don’t need what we’ve become; they need what God created us to be. They need kings that will treat them like queens, they need warriors that will treat them with gentleness and kindness, they need friends that will listen and care, and they need partners that will shoulder the emotional burdens of life together with them. Care for your wives men… that does not mean, “bring home a check”, the active verb is “care”. First care for her, and then – through daily action – care for her. Protect her heart and champion her cause and I promise you, you’ll begin to see a queen that is radiant and fulfilled.

What do your kids need? They need presence. They need to see you live life, interacting with others and making decisions. They need specific training, yes; but more important is to let them see who you are as you live life as a man. Your daughters need touching, love, and time. If you don’t give them this often, they will soon find another male to give it to them, and trust me when I tell you that you don’t want that. Your sons need to understand what work is, what sacrifice is, and why we do both of these things. Both genders need to understand our view of – and relationship to – God and what “life” looks like outside the family. Your children should be able to express emotion in a safe environment and should know that no matter what they do, they are still your child and that you love them (this does not make a statement about consequence).

Men, this is a country filled with guys who don’t have great adventure in life; they watch them in movies. Men don’t play many sports anymore, they watch football on TV. Men don’t take the time and energy to be lovers to their wives, they watch porn on the internet. Men don’t live life in their role 24 hours a day anymore, they go to work, come home and go into a TV or computer world, expecting their wives to pick up the “slack”. I encourage you not to be this man! 

So, how do we do it? Simple. We stamp out only three things and add one. The three are, lust, pride, and selfishness. That’s it, three little things. (for those of you who don’t know me, this would be tongue-in-cheek humor).

Lust
This one is a killer fellas. It’s a part of selfishness but with guys, it needs its own little category (and coffin). Your wife whom the Lord gave you and with whom you should take your joy, is the only woman that you should be expending any emotional energy on. You’ve all seen sitcoms or movies where the man puts a centerfold up on the bedstead to get excited with his wife, and we laugh and say that’s pathetic, but we each do this exact same thing. If you have ever slept with a woman that is not your wife, watched a movie with pornographic content, viewed a magazine with scantily clad (or unclad) women, or lusted after another woman in your heart; it is incredibly likely that you are bringing these images to mind, and that is being unfaithful to your wife! More than this, since we’ve likely masturbated to these images or thoughts, we will bring back these memories with our wives in the moment that God designed us to be only with one another, while we are making love. Can you begin to see why pornography and pre-marital sex are a huge problem? We men are visual and we remember visually. This is not helpful when we are trying to focus on our wife. I would suggest that you drive out thoughts and images of other women, and this takes a long time to do, but it is worth it. I would further suggest that you slow your sexual pace down to a point where you do not need to conjure up images to “get excited” but are already so full of anticipation that you can focus fully on your wife without bringing other women into your mind. On another note, this pace may be more naturally in line with your wife’s pace, but we can discuss that theory another time.

Pride
You don’t always have to “win”, to be “right”, to be the “Big Dog”. Let others have their time in the sun as well. It’s your job to build self-confidence in your children, not to tear it down. You are to hold up you wife, not make her question her sanity. Stop the belittling comments and the desire to make others look bad. Instead, build others up verbally, assuming that they already are what they could become, and then watch them become that. Suck it up, and take your part of the blame (and stop there). When you are confronted with an issue in life, stop trying to find out “who’s fault it was”. Investigate only YOUR part of it and how to avoid it the next time or how you might act in a more honorable manner if faced with the same situation again.

Selfishness
Newsflash fellas, it isn’t all about you! It’s about her and the kids. Set yourself aside and look for what you can do to serve your family. If I hear even one of you complain, “I’ve had a long day at work and I deserve to sit down”, I swear I’ll come to your place and exhort you to excellence personally and vigorously. Her day started before yours and will end after yours, and she’ll give more of herself than you will. You don’t “deserve” to sit down, she does. Change your attitude and approach. Let her sit and put her feet up. Bring her tea and do the dinner dishes for her. I KNOW YOU DON’T WANT TO, THAT’S THE ENTIRE POINT!!! Set yourself aside and put her in the place she deserves, in your heart, mind, and in the home. She is your queen. As a side note, the kids quickly pick up on this and become people with servant-hearts as well.

The One Thing
This blog is heavy in “Christian” metaphor and belief, and that is because I believe that what we do here is temporary and preparatory for an eternity with He who created us. The changes suggested in this post will help any man with his wife and kids, but the real change comes when we open our hearts to the Good News, filling ourselves with the Holy Spirit and allowing Him to work in us to change us. The other three do not fall away without a fight, but you need strength to put away the old and bring in the new, and Christ will give that strength.

Cowboy up, men! There is a world full of sons that don’t know what a man is or does, daughters that are looking for love, and wives that need us to be present and accounted for. Hear the challenge and rise to it.