Window or Mirror?

“Avoid extremes; forbear resenting injuries so much as you think they deserve.”

1. The state in which something remains moderate rather than becoming extreme or excessive

The true boundary of man is moderation. When once we pass that pale, our guardian angel quits his charge of us. - Owen Feltham

In moderating, not in satisfying desires, lies peace. - Reginald Heber

Franklin’s words bring to life a dimension of this virtue that is not commonly considered; the idea that emotion should be moderated. There is a point at which almost every thought or action becomes unhealthy, and the virtuous person will seek to define that “tipping point”, and then remain firmly on the fair side of it.

Many argue that moderation is an argument for a society of “Type B” clones and automatons. Quite the opposite, with a firmly defined boundary, a wide array of passion and emotion is freely available. When the edges of the playing field are known, a lot of free-spirited running and fun can be had. Conversely, if you don’t know where to begin and end, movement is tentative and halting. Free yourself with virtue-born boundaries!

My personal ideas on moderation are these:

Know yourself, know the terrain, know your limits
Firstly, to know yourself, you must train your mind to recognize your own faults and foibles. Emotions must be curbed and guided, taken as one source of input for decision-making. Secondly, closely examine the environment in this situation – no two are the same – and many variables can change your perspective. Finally, understand what your own physical, emotional, intellectual, and moral limits are. Knowing these “lines” is the only way to know when you are approaching dangerous ground.

Regulate your thoughts, guide your emotions
Reason is a wonderful thing, and should be taken as input for every decision, no matter how trivial. Employed alone, it has the potential to produce an uncaring and detached approach to the world, do not neglect your heart. To encourage the more frequent application of reason is most necessary in the world today, but a word on emotion is also necessary. I would caution that emotion should be toned down in our own mind, and should always be played to the world a level below the way we feel it. I’ll leave you with the wisdom of my grandfather; “Son, never ignore a gut instinct, but never believe that it’s enough”

Consider the source and understand diversity
Newsflash – not everyone thinks and feels like you do, or for the same reasons! You haven’t any idea of the upbringing of the other parties in the social transaction, nor do you have full knowledge of their motives. Go with the assumption of positive intent, even though you might get “burned” emotionally from time to time. Assuming that others mean well, and are merely acting in a way that you cannot understand opens you to the chance of disappointment, but the positive benefit on you and society is well worth it.